¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

computer game is not good for children

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¤*¹Î
2021-04-22 701

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think computer game is not good for children.
First reason, If they play computer game. They can fall into games. And they only want to play computer games. Also they poor social powers.
The second reason, If children plays many time on computer game they don't want to stop games so they don't listen to his mother spiking.So his personality becomes grotesque.
That's the reason why I think computer game is not good for children.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Jed. Thank you for this. For these reasons you mentioned, I hope you don't pay too much computer games then.
- T. Beth
================================

I think computer game is not good for children.
>>>    correct
First reason, If they play computer game. 
They can fall into games. And they only want to play computer games. 
>>> The first reason is, if they play computer games they can get addicted and they would only want to keep playing computer games.
Also they poor social powers.
>>Also, they would have poor social skills.    
The second reason, If children plays many time on computer game they don't want to stop games so they don't listen to his mother spiking.
>>> The second reason, if children play computer game for a long time, they wouldn't want to stop so they won't listen to their mother speaking.   
So his personality becomes grotesque.
>>> Their personality become grotesque.   
That's the reason why I think computer game is not good for children.
>>>  correct  
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
108043 Do you believe in life after death? Why or Why not? ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-29 669
108042 Homework (273) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-29 685
108041 homework ±è*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-29 0
108040 Various animals ¼±*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-04-29 859
108039 homework ±è*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-29 0
108038 What is the best holiday for you? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-29 3
108037 Reddy and Letty ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-04-29 1035
108036 What is your favorite artwork? ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-29 1
108035 What\'s the best advice from your parents? ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-29 863
108034 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-04-29 619
108033 Someone I admire.. ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-04-29 619
108032 Can you tell me about someone you admire? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-29 1
108031 Shinhan Card to call all employees including CEO by name À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-29 1
108030 Spring ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-04-29 749
108029 Homework Ç¥*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-29 8
108028 Homework ½É*»ó ¿Ï·á 2021-04-29 733
108027 Homework ½É*»ó ¿Ï·á 2021-04-29 711
108026 If you wanted to reward yourself for something that you did,... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-29 1
108025 Stressed out ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-29 2
108024 sentence °­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-29 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04