¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think that women should also join the military there in Korea?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ø
2021-04-27 561

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

No, I don¡¯t think so. Because we have women¡¯s army corps so women can join it if they want. But I think it should not be necessarily because women have a period for every months so it will be hard to do it. I think it¡¯s enough with them.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Heidi! Women joining the military has been a big controversy in South Korea. There has been speculations that it promotes gender inequality. I think that they should allow women to join the military but not mandatorily. Only the volunteers shall enter it because some women are not capable of doing things like that. If you have the ability, then you can. But if you don't, it's fine. :) Thanks for sharing your opinion. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!

No, I don¡¯t think so. Because we have women¡¯s army corps so women can join it if they want. 
>> No, I don't think so because there is already a women's army corporation for women who want to join the militay. 

But I think it should not be necessarily because women have a period for every months so it will be hard to do it. 
>> Although I think it should not be necessary because women experience monthly periods so it would be difficult for them to do. 

I think it¡¯s enough with them.
>> I think that would be enough. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
108254 If you will have a party, who will you invite? ¼Û*·É ¿Ï·á 2021-05-06 663
108253 How close are you to your extended family? ¼Û*·É ¿Ï·á 2021-05-06 1064
108252 Social problem ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-05-06 644
108251 Homework °­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-06 601
108250 Do you think all celebrities are talented? ±è*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-06 671
108249 If I am in the shopping mall, I will buy some beautiful clothes. ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-05-06 632
108248 Like toy ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-05-06 614
108247 Homework Ç¥*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-06 7
108246 Five ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-06 3
108245 What do you think was the most important invention in history? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-06 708
108244 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-05-06 842
108243 SMILE ANSWER º¯*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-06 584
108242 Homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-05-06 3
108241 Many parents give their children certain chores or tasks to do... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-06 0
108240 What do you think was the most important invention in history? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-05-06 1
108239 What do you think was the most important invention in history? ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-06 952
108238 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-05-06 2
108237 Oceans minister nominee comes under fire for wife\'s alleged... À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-05-06 1
108236 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-06 2
108235 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-06 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04