¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think that women should also join the military there in Korea?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ø
2021-04-27 597

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

No, I don¡¯t think so. Because we have women¡¯s army corps so women can join it if they want. But I think it should not be necessarily because women have a period for every months so it will be hard to do it. I think it¡¯s enough with them.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Heidi! Women joining the military has been a big controversy in South Korea. There has been speculations that it promotes gender inequality. I think that they should allow women to join the military but not mandatorily. Only the volunteers shall enter it because some women are not capable of doing things like that. If you have the ability, then you can. But if you don't, it's fine. :) Thanks for sharing your opinion. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!

No, I don¡¯t think so. Because we have women¡¯s army corps so women can join it if they want. 
>> No, I don't think so because there is already a women's army corporation for women who want to join the militay. 

But I think it should not be necessarily because women have a period for every months so it will be hard to do it. 
>> Although I think it should not be necessary because women experience monthly periods so it would be difficult for them to do. 

I think it¡¯s enough with them.
>> I think that would be enough. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
107680 How important is nutrition to us humans? Ȳ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 644
107679 [04/15]Homework ¹Ú*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 1
107678 homework ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 0
107677 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 589
107676 Do you believe that first impressions last? ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 488
107675 About temperature! ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 629
107674 Task ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 628
107673 HOMEWORK Á¤*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 0
107672 Homework °­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 570
107671 My favorite TV program ÁÖ*³ª ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 6
107670 If you are talking with someone and you think they are lying, do... ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 1
107669 What is your unforgettable transport experience? Share your... ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 0
107668 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 0
107667 How do you take care of the things you own? ½Å*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 708
107666 What do you usually do when you are facing a really big problem? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 7
107665 Create a sentence. ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 1020
107664 I learned about this at my science class. ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 669
107663 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 3
107662 Disobey Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 752
107661 Why Are You Leaving Your Current Job? À¯*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-19 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04