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영작교정 게시판

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자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

There are many female students who finish degrees in science and technology courses at university, b

작성자: 황*하
2021-04-28 594

회원님의 영작문

I heard that there are a lot of people who have the university degree in Korea compared to other countries. We used to get a job right after graduation of high school. People didn't think degrees were more important than experience at work. So, many people preferred to build up experience rather than enter the university. However, we believe that students can't get a job if they don't have the graduation certification of university these days. Women used to be a house wife before our country developed. There has been many chances for women to be part of members at work. So, women tried to study hard and as a result, they have entered the better university. Even though, women put their efforts a lot, our society still don't acknowledge women's abilities due to the gender discrimination. Many business man think that men have to take women's duty during women's maternity leave even if employer hire part time worker. Staffs have to train them from the begging that can be annoying.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi there Mr. Hwang! Thanks for doing your homework! ^^ I'm still not well huhuhu. I hope your having a good week!~
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I heard that there are a lot of people who have the university degree in Korea compared to other countries.
>>> I heard that there are a lot of people who have university degrees in Korea compared to other countries.
 We used to get a job right after graduation of high school. 
>>>  We used to get a job right after graduating high school. 
People didn't think degrees were more important than experience at work. 
>>> People didn't think degrees were more important than work experience. 
So, many people preferred to build up experience rather than enter the university. 
>>> So, many people preferred to build up experiences rather than entering university. 
However, we believe that students can't get a job if they don't have the graduation certification of university these days.
>>> However, we believe that students can't get a job if they don't have  a university diploma these days.
 Women used to be a house wife before our country developed. 
>>>  Women used to be housewives before our country was developed. 
There has been many chances for women to be part of members at work.
>>> There has been many chances for women to take part at work.
 So, women tried to study hard and as a result, they have entered the better university. 
>>>  So, women tried to study hard and as a result, they have entered in better universities. 
Even though, women put their efforts a lot, our society still don't acknowledge women's abilities due to the gender discrimination. 
>>> Even though, women put their efforts a lot, our society still doesn't acknowledge women's abilities due to the gender discrimination. 
Many business man think that men have to take women's duty during women's maternity leave even if employer hire part time workers.
>>> CORRECT
 Staffs have to train them from the begging that can be annoying.
>>> The staff have to train them from the beginning which can be annoying.
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전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
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04

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