¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK: Would you consider living in a retirement home when you\'re older? Why or why not?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¼º
2021-04-30 705

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Would you consider living in a retirement home when you're older? Why or why not?

I don't know exactly what the retirement home is, but just based on my first impression of it, I don't prefer living in a retirement home despite when I get very older.
As long as I'm able to do something in the future, I want to be a member of society. Because I want to do what I can for someone, and also it makes me to feel that I'm living.
As I was writing, I came to talk about retirement rather than answers as to whether or not I prefer to live in a retirement home.
Please let me know next time what a retirement home is. Thanks.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Homer. :) 

A retirement home is a place where the elderly stay when they are quite too old to take care of themselves. 
Usually, in Korea, the children of elderly people send their parents to retirement homes so that the nurses there can take better care of them. 
Thank you for your time and effort in making a composition. ^^

~t. Ally


--------------

I don't know exactly what the retirement home is, but just based on my first impression of it, I don't prefer living in a retirement home despite when I get very older.
>> I don't know what a retirement home is, exactly, but based on my first impression of it, I don't prefer living in a retirement home when I become older.

As long as I'm able to do something in the future, I want to be a member of society. 
>> CORRECT!

Because I want to do what I can for someone, and also it makes me to feel that I'm living.
>> Because I want to do what I can for others, and it also makes me feel alive.

As I was writing, I came to talk about retirement rather than answers as to whether or not I prefer to live in a retirement home.
>> As I was writing, I ended up talking about retirement rather than answering whether or not I prefer to live in a retirement home.

Please let me know next time what a retirement home is. Thanks.
>>  CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
107974 Make a sentence using the words below ÀÌ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 562
107973 Homework ÀÓ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 735
107972 When you are stressed, how do you feel physically? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 1
107971 Do you think people can become addicted to shopping? º¯*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 2
107970 Homework 2 »ç* ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 1
107969 Homework 1 »ç* ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 2
107968 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 1
107967 Task ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 676
107966 Happiness! ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 564
107965 What are the things that you want to collect? ±è*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 644
107964 Work2 ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 536
107963 Work1 ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 1268
107962 Could tell me about your memorable graduation experience? ÇÏ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 606
107961 Homework: Do you believe that people must work hard to become... ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 672
107960 Homework ±è*È¿ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 715
107959 Do you think that women should also join the military there in... ±è*¿­ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-28 792
107958 Do you agree that cryptocurrency should be taxed? Why or why not? ±Ç*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-27 602
107957 A review of a new restaurant. ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-27 588
107956 interview Q ±Ç*½Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-04-27 0
107955 Homework (271) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-27 644

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04