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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
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Do you think that the issue put your president in a difficult situation? If you\'re the president wh

작성자: 권*원
2021-04-30 774

회원님의 영작문

To discuss these issues, we have to know different opinions between conservatives and liberals.
Our president has a progressive political tendency.
Liberals don’t like conglomerates because they prefer equality.
Perhaps, I think that our president wants to develop other companies other than Sam sung equally. From liberal’s point of view, the presence of Samsung prevents other companies from developing. So, maybe Moon Jae-in may not think the fact that Lee Jae-yong was arrested seriously.
However, many conservative personages are insisting on release of him considering their interests.
Even some nationals are insisting on the release of him. Therefore, this issue put our president into a difficult situation.
Since I am a liberal like our president, if I become a president, it will be also a difficult problem to me as well. But I will not release him because even if he doesn’t present, Samsung has many good managements and it may be an opportunity of growth to developing companies.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good Evening Cleo,

  Thank you for taking time to answer this question. It only proves that you really wanted to improve in your English skill. Please do check and take note of the corrections for your improvement. I hope it helped you. 

Keep up the good work!

Sincerely,
Teacher Annie (^^)


Do you think that the issue put your president in a difficult situation? 
If you\'re the president what will you do regarding the issue? Explain.


To discuss these issues, we have to know different opinions between conservatives and liberals.
>>> To discuss these issues, we have to know the different opinions between the conservatives and the liberals.

Our president has a progressive political tendency.
>>> CORRECT

Liberals don’t like conglomerates because they prefer equality.
>>> CORRECT

Perhaps, I think that our president wants to develop other companies other than Sam sung equally. 
>>> Perhaps, I think that our president wants to develop other companies other than Samsung and he wants equality. 

From liberal’s point of view, the presence of Samsung prevents other companies from developing. 
>>> From the liberal’s point of view, the presence of Samsung prevents other companies from developing. 

So, maybe Moon Jae-in may not think the fact that Lee Jae-yong was arrested seriously.
>>> So, maybe President Moon Jae-in may have not thought seriously the fact that Lee Jae-yong was arrested.

However, many conservative personages are insisting on release of him considering their interests.
>>> However, many conservative personages are insisting on the release of him considering their interests.

Even some nationals are insisting on the release of him. Therefore, this issue put our president into a difficult situation.
>>> Even some of the Nationals are insisting on the release of him. Therefore, this issue put our president in a difficult situation.

Since I am a liberal like our president, if I become a president, it will be also a difficult problem to me as well. 
>>> Since I am also a liberal like our president, if I become a president, it will also be a difficult decision for me as well. 

But I will not release him because even if he doesn’t present, Samsung has many good managements and it may be an opportunity of growth to developing companies.
>>> But I will not release him because even if he is not present, Samsung can still manage its own company and it may be an opportunity of growth to developing companies too. 
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