¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Thursday homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*¿ì
2021-05-06 977

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Q:Do you think hiking is only for old people?
A:I don't think it's only for old people.
First, young people and not old people can love hiking so it's not only for old people.
Second, hiking is good at our health so anyone can hike for their health or their fun.
Last, many people love hiking and they can hike anytime when they have free time so it's not only for old people.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Paul,

  Thank you for taking time to answer this question. It only proves that you really wanted to improve in your English skill. Please do check and take note of the corrections for your improvement. I hope it helped you. 

Keep up the good work!

Sincerely,
Teacher Annie (^^)



Q: Do you think hiking is only for old people?

A: I don't think it's only for old people.
>>> CORRECT

First, young people and not old people can love hiking so it's not only for old people.
>>> First, young people can also love hiking so I personally think it's not only for old people. 

Second, hiking is good at our health so anyone can hike for their health or their fun.
>>> Second, hiking is good for our health so anyone can hike for their health or for fun.

Last, many people love hiking and they can hike anytime when they have free time so it's not only for old people.
>>> Lastly, many people love hiking and they can do it anytime when they have free time.  So it's not only for old people, anybody either young or old can hike. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
109935 Dear. Teacher Maine ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-07-09 521
109934 Why do many people from different parts of the world want to... ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-07-09 337
109933 What is the best reason why people get a pet in your country... ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-09 438
109932 homework Àü*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-09 587
109931 I agree with Mike\'s Opinion ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-07-09 662
109930 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-09 1
109929 Absent ¼Û*ö ¿Ï·á 2021-07-09 540
109928 If you are to start a business, what would that be and why? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-09 0
109927 Homework {07/09} Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-07-09 452
109926 Do you think that talent is needed to be successful in life? Why... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-09 530
109925 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-07-09 490
109924 Stories À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-09 504
109923 What do you like do doing your free time ÀÌ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2021-07-09 483
109922 \"Serious sport has nothing to do with fair play. It is bound up... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-09 505
109921 Homework. ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-09 401
109920 What do you like about your neighborhood? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-09 0
109919 Homework😀 ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-07-09 383
109918 Is being poor a valid reason to commit crime? Why or why not? ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-09 516
109917 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-07-09 4
109916 Opposition talks about scrapping Ministry of Gender Equality À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-09 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04