¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Home work(5.5)

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Àº
2021-05-07 732

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

WRITING TASK: Is aging more difficult for men or women? Why?
I think aging is more difficult for men. Because usually men more like alcohol and smoking than women. Many men who like alcohol or smoking started it when they were young. If they would not stop it after they get elders, it might affect to their health badly. Also, women are more sensitive about skin aging and weight than men. Women are trying to keep nice skin and bodies.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Wow! I like your thoughts about this question, Ji Eun! You clearly explained your reason to me. Good job! -Faith-
WRITING TASK: Is aging more difficult for men or women? Why?
>> CORRECT
I think aging is more difficult for men. 
>> CORRECT
Because usually men more like alcohol and smoking than women. 
>> Because, usually men like alcohol and smoking more than women. 
Many men who like alcohol or smoking started it when they were young. 
>> Many men who like alcohol or smoking start doing it at a young age. 
If they would not stop it after they get elders, it might affect to their health badly. 
>> If they would not stop it as they get old, it might affect their health badly. 
Also, women are more sensitive about skin aging and weight than men.
>> CORRECT
OR Women are more self-conscious about skin imperfections than men.
 Women are trying to keep nice skin and bodies.
 >> Women try to keep nice skin and body shape.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
107334 Giving a life-changing advice to someone. ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-08 788
107333 Homework (258) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-08 920
107332 Who is your role model in your life? Why? ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-08 1181
107331 What are the good things about the educational system in Korea? ±è*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-08 0
107330 I... Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-08 1
107329 My mind ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-08 2
107328 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-04-08 573
107327 My suggestion letter in my business. À±*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-04-08 1
107326 Homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-04-08 3
107325 [04/07]Homework ¹Ú*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2021-04-08 661
107324 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-04-08 929
107323 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-04-08 714
107322 Simple, but pretty~^^ ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-04-08 761
107321 Fill in the blanks. ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-04-08 823
107320 Have or has Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-04-08 666
107319 What would you change about your life if you could? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-08 1
107318 What are the personality and physical differences between you... È«*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-08 1
107317 HOMEWORK ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-08 532
107316 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-04-08 709
107315 Homework Ç¥*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-08 4

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04