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How has your town or city changed over your lifetime?

작성자: 황*수
2021-05-12 732

회원님의 영작문

I still remember that the sky has beautiful stars in front of my house. There were so many neighbors and my friends in the street. I visited the street, where i lived when i was childhood, changed too many things. There are so many buildings now. But, it was hard to find people on the road. Surely, no more starts in the sky as well. For 20 years, my city is changed too much. There are no more neighbors and barely can find warm relationship with people. People are being rich but their mind is being poor. To be honest, i don't care about those.... I just hope that our house price will increase a lot. The biggest change is me.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello Jay! 
I laughed so hard about the house price!!!
Yeah, it will definitely rise if the neighborhood you live in is good for business - hahaha. 
Thanks^^ 

I still remember that the sky has beautiful stars in front of my house. 
>>> CORRECT! 
OR: I still remember that there are beautiful stars in front of my house.
There were so many neighbors and my friends in the street. 
>>> There were many neighbors and friends on the street.
I visited the street, where i lived when i was childhood, changed too many things. 
>>> I visited the street where I lived when I was young, and so many things have changed.
There are so many buildings now. 
>>> CORRECT! 
But, it was hard to find people on the road. 
>>> However, it was difficult to find people on the road.
Surely, no more starts in the sky as well. 
>>> Of course, there are no more stars in the sky.
For 20 years, my city is changed too much. 
>>> For 20 years, my city has changed too much. 
There are no more neighbors and barely can find warm relationship with people. 
>>> There are no neighbors anymore and you can barely find a warm relationship with people.
People are being rich but their mind is being poor. 
>>> People are getting rich, but their minds poor.
To be honest, i don't care about those.... I just hope that our house price will increase a lot. 
>>> To be honest, I don't care about that. I just want our house prices to go up a lot.
The biggest change is me.
>>> CORRECT! 
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