¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Writing task

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¾Æ
2021-05-14 510

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Q) Why is it important to train our dogs at an early age?

A)
As educating child of human, it is important to train dogs at an early age because it is easier to make them a habit. It is difficult to change when bad behavior has become a habit already. Thus in korea there is a old saying, "The habit of three years old lasts to eighty."

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Laura!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Here are some of the corrections, but other than that, you really did great. :) Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

Q) Why is it important to train our dogs at an early age?

A)
As educating child of human, it is important to train dogs at an early age because it is easier to make them a habit. 
>> Like educating a child, it is important to train dogs at an early age because it is easier for them to make a habit. 

It is difficult to change when bad behavior has become a habit already. 
>> CORRECT!

Thus in korea there is a old saying, "The habit of three years old lasts to eighty."
>> Thus in Korea there is an old saying, "The habit of three years old lasts to eighty."

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
107762 Make a sentence using the words below ÀÌ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 3287
107761 What is a family ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 648
107760 What is on your bucket list? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 1
107759 Do you like meeting new people? ÀÌ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 575
107758 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 1
107757 Lunar eclipse is~ ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 626
107756 What is on your bucket list? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 583
107755 Writing Sample Á¶*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 674
107754 Wednesday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 604
107753 Summer vacation. ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 2
107752 Is it healthy to eat eggs everyday? ½Å*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 556
107751 What can you say about requiring all women to attend the... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 713
107750 homework ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 726
107749 Would you rather celebrate your birthday with just your... ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 1
107748 Which is more important, acting or special effects? Why? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 1
107747 SMILE ANSWER º¯*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 590
107746 Write about some common lunch boxes or Doshira in your city. ¿À*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 778
107745 What do you usually do when you are facing a really big problem? ¹Ú*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 683
107744 Homework📓 ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 607
107743 \"No one realizes how beautiful it is to travel until he comes... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-04-21 658

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04