¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Tuesday homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*¿ì
2021-05-18 1070

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Q:What other tips you can give to someone to fall asleep?
A:I can give a tip if I cannot sleep I just think about something that I want to, then I fall asleep faster then doing nothing.
First, I always don't know when I sleep, but one thing is sure that I was thinking about something that I want to think.
Second, I always think something that I want to think when I cannot sleep, then I fall asleep soon.
Last, I think it's because if I think something that I want to, then I'll fill good so I can fall asleep faster then doing nothing.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Paul,

  Thank you for taking time to answer this question. It only proves that you really wanted to improve in your English skill. Please do check and take note of the corrections for your improvement. I hope it helped you. 

Keep up the good work!

Sincerely,
Teacher Annie (^^)


Q: What other tips you can give to someone to fall asleep?

A: I can give a tip if I cannot sleep I just think about something that I want to, then I fall asleep faster then doing nothing.
>>> One tip that I can give to someone who cannot fall asleep; just think about something that you want to, then you will fall asleep faster than doing nothing.


First, I always don't know when I sleep, but one thing is sure that I was thinking about something that I want to think.
>>> First, I always don't know when I fall asleep, but one thing is for sure that I was thinking about something that I want to before I fall asleep. 

Second, I always think something that I want to think when I cannot sleep, then I fall asleep soon.
>>> Second, I always think of something that I want to think about when I cannot fall asleep, then I'll fall asleep soon.

Last, I think it's because if I think something that I want to, then I'll fill good so I can fall asleep faster then doing nothing.
>>> Lastly, I think it's because if I think something that I want, then I'll feel good so I can fall asleep faster than doing nothing. 



*NOTE: Please remember that it's not last but it's "lastly". Another thing make sure that your not repeating the same idea and sentence again and again. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
108604 What\'s new with you? ¼Û*·É ¿Ï·á 2021-05-18 546
108603 Homework ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-05-17 1
108602 How do you feel when you see a person so prim and proper? ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-05-17 1
108601 Homework (284) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-17 561
108600 What are the advantages and disadvantages of increasing tourism... ÃÖ*¾È ¿Ï·á 2021-05-17 1079
108599 If a person steals a loaf of bread because he needs to feed his... ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-05-17 823
108598 What are the advantages and disadvantages of increasing tourism... ÃÖ*¾È ¿Ï·á 2021-05-17 2
108597 Homework 5 / 17 / MON ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-17 770
108596 English competency and my life ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-17 571
108595 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-05-17 546
108594 HOMEWORK Á¤*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-17 1
108593 HOMEWORK Á¤*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-17 1
108592 HOMEWORK Á¤*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-17 1
108591 report 8-3 ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-17 418
108590 Report 8-2, ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-17 451
108589 Report 8-1 ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-17 474
108588 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-05-17 534
108587 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-05-17 419
108586 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-17 0
108585 Do you think there¡¯s life on other planets? ±è*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-17 1116

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04