¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¼º
2021-05-19 885

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

What do you think was the most important invention in history?

I think it's definitely using fire. Since our ancient ancestors were using fire, they could protect themselves from cold, dangerous animals, and cook meat well. Cooking with fire helps them to take protein easily so it comes to be improved their intelligence.
There are lots of remarkable inventions in human history but because of those listed reasons above, I think using fire is the most impactful invention in the history of mankind.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Homer! All inventions serve a purpose to everyone. They are made to make our lives more convenient although there are some that stand out to us the most. Thanks for sharing yours :) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!


I think it's definitely using fire. 
>> CORRECT

Since our ancient ancestors were using fire, they could protect themselves from cold, dangerous animals, and cook meat well. 
>> Since our ancient ancestors used fire, they could cook and protect themselves from the cold and dangerous animals.

Cooking with fire helps them to take protein easily so it comes to be improved their intelligence.
>> Cooking with fire helps them to take protein easily. It has been improved because of technology. 

There are lots of remarkable inventions in human history but because of those listed reasons above, I think using fire is the most impactful invention in the history of mankind.
>> There are lots of remarkable inventions in human history but because of those listed reasons above, I think using fire has the most impact in the history of mankind.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
111251 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 0
111250 Writing on skype ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 350
111249 Writing on skype ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 585
111248 Writing on skype ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 379
111247 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 428
111246 ¼÷Á¦ ±è*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 502
111245 Homework {08/25} Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 386
111244 18th homework Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 3
111243 If you had 3 wishes, what would it be and why? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 524
111242 Wednesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 517
111241 How do you make your patients feel secured under your care as a... Á¤*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 482
111240 homework À±*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 442
111239 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 388
111238 I am a worried and maximum list person Á¤*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 485
111237 My birthday ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 1
111236 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 418
111235 Hi ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 1
111234 When is it a perfect time to daydream? ÀÌ*¶÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 4
111233 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 384
111232 Tell me about the best part of your day? Çã*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04