¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¼º
2021-05-19 675

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

What do you think was the most important invention in history?

I think it's definitely using fire. Since our ancient ancestors were using fire, they could protect themselves from cold, dangerous animals, and cook meat well. Cooking with fire helps them to take protein easily so it comes to be improved their intelligence.
There are lots of remarkable inventions in human history but because of those listed reasons above, I think using fire is the most impactful invention in the history of mankind.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Homer! All inventions serve a purpose to everyone. They are made to make our lives more convenient although there are some that stand out to us the most. Thanks for sharing yours :) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!


I think it's definitely using fire. 
>> CORRECT

Since our ancient ancestors were using fire, they could protect themselves from cold, dangerous animals, and cook meat well. 
>> Since our ancient ancestors used fire, they could cook and protect themselves from the cold and dangerous animals.

Cooking with fire helps them to take protein easily so it comes to be improved their intelligence.
>> Cooking with fire helps them to take protein easily. It has been improved because of technology. 

There are lots of remarkable inventions in human history but because of those listed reasons above, I think using fire is the most impactful invention in the history of mankind.
>> There are lots of remarkable inventions in human history but because of those listed reasons above, I think using fire has the most impact in the history of mankind.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
108998 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-06-01 2
108997 how many aunt do you have and who are they? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-06-01 353
108996 I think that it is good to endure anger as possible as. ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-01 369
108995 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-01 1
108994 Do you prefer baths or showers? Is it better to take a bath /... È«*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-01 1
108993 today\'s homework ÀÓ*ÃÑ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-01 326
108992 HM-4 ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 390
108991 [05/27]Homework ¹Ú*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 1
108990 Homework (294) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 329
108989 Do you think it¡¯s good to share photos on social media? ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 384
108988 [05/26]Homework ¹Ú*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 1
108987 HOMEWORK ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 373
108986 HOMEWORK ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 341
108985 Complain about jobs ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 1
108984 homework of friday ±è*±¸ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 311
108983 Beauty ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 334
108982 [05/25]Homework ¹Ú*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 3
108981 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 402
108980 How can you develop a good habit? ÇÏ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 370
108979 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-05-31 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04