¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¼º
2021-05-19 684

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

What do you think was the most important invention in history?

I think it's definitely using fire. Since our ancient ancestors were using fire, they could protect themselves from cold, dangerous animals, and cook meat well. Cooking with fire helps them to take protein easily so it comes to be improved their intelligence.
There are lots of remarkable inventions in human history but because of those listed reasons above, I think using fire is the most impactful invention in the history of mankind.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Homer! All inventions serve a purpose to everyone. They are made to make our lives more convenient although there are some that stand out to us the most. Thanks for sharing yours :) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!


I think it's definitely using fire. 
>> CORRECT

Since our ancient ancestors were using fire, they could protect themselves from cold, dangerous animals, and cook meat well. 
>> Since our ancient ancestors used fire, they could cook and protect themselves from the cold and dangerous animals.

Cooking with fire helps them to take protein easily so it comes to be improved their intelligence.
>> Cooking with fire helps them to take protein easily. It has been improved because of technology. 

There are lots of remarkable inventions in human history but because of those listed reasons above, I think using fire is the most impactful invention in the history of mankind.
>> There are lots of remarkable inventions in human history but because of those listed reasons above, I think using fire has the most impact in the history of mankind.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
108565 Homework ÀÓ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-17 373
108564 what makes you happy ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-05-17 441
108563 Home work(5.14) ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-05-17 400
108562 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-17 1
108561 task ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-17 395
108560 Homework ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-05-17 475
108559 If a person steals a loaf of bread because he needs to feed his... ±è*¿­ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-17 523
108558 Safety and Design ¾È*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-16 2
108557 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-16 521
108556 If you had teleporting abilities, what¡¯s the first place you... ¼Û*Áø ÁøÇàÁß 2021-05-16 0
108555 Due to pollution the number of people getting infected also rose... ¼Û*Áø ÁøÇàÁß 2021-05-16 0
108554 If a person steals a loaf of bread because he needs to feed his... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-05-16 2
108553 How long do you think couples should know each other before they... ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-16 3
108552 Homework ±è*È¿ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-16 548
108551 Homework ±è*È¿ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-16 554
108550 Homework ±è*È¿ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-16 1078
108549 Live ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-16 3
108548 Online Videos Ruining Kids\' reading Comprehension À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-05-16 1
108547 What\'s the best memory you have from your childhood? ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-15 906
108546 School Performance Assessment 5-2 (writing an article) ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-15 7

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04