¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

How is beauty defined in your culture?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-05-21 707

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In the past, beauty was defined as the things that is very harmonious with nature.
Over time, lots of people wanted to defined beauty.
So scientists made the thing that is very beautyful, and it is called 'Golden Ratio'.
Lots of people thought 'Golden Ratio' is the real beauty.
So lots of artists made lots of paintings that are used 'Golden Ratio'.
But over time, lots of people thought 'the harmonious with color' is the thing that is very beautyful.
And now, everybody thinks the beauty as 'the things that I feel very beautyful.'.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John! In this world, there shouldn't be any beauty standard. Everyone should feel good in their own appearance. Like what they say, "Beauty is in the eye of the beholder". :) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon!

In the past, beauty was defined as the things that is very harmonious with nature.
>> In the past, beauty was defined  to be very harmonious with nature.

Over time, lots of people wanted to defined beauty.
>> Over time, lots of people wanted to be defined  as beautiful. 

So scientists made the thing that is very beautyful, and it is called 'Golden Ratio'.
>> So scientists made something that is very beautiful and it is called 'Golden Ratio'.

Lots of people thought 'Golden Ratio' is the real beauty.
>> CORRECT

So lots of artists made lots of paintings that are used 'Golden Ratio'.
>> So lots of artists made lots of paintings using the Golden Ratio'.

But over time, lots of people thought 'the harmonious with color' is the thing that is very beautyful.
>> But over time, lots of people thought 'the harmonious with color' is the thing that is very beautiful.

And now, everybody thinks the beauty as 'the things that I feel very beautyful.'.
>> Now everybody think that feeling beautiful in  your own body is beautiful. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
111267 My family ±è*À» ¿Ï·á 2021-08-26 2
111266 8.25 homework ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 2
111265 Kate! ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 1
111264 Use manageable, motivated, and pound in a correct sentence. ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 447
111263 page 5 ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 374
111262 HOMEWORK: Why is honesty important? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 481
111261 Describe how you get when you¡¯re moody in a few sentences. ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 2
111260 Do you always believe the media? ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 2
111259 8/25: My Money~~~~ ¿À*°á ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 403
111258 Famous place of Seoul ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 462
111257 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 467
111256 If you had 3 wishes, what would it be and why? ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 437
111255 4th ±è*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 1
111254 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 6
111253 61 ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 430
111252 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 376
111251 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 0
111250 Writing on skype ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 356
111249 Writing on skype ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 595
111248 Writing on skype ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 390

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04