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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Um...mabye the story will be scary.....

작성자: 김*랑
2021-05-22 498

회원님의 영작문

I can't remember all of their names, but the names of my best friends are Christina and James. Christina and James were the first friends I made that come the United States, and they were lemon-bans like peninsula, so I was able to get along more closely. My mother was also close to Christina and James's mother, so I could see it often with them. One day, Christina's mom ask to my mom to go on a picnic with James! So, we quickly wrapped up and went on a picnic. But as soon as we arrive, someone screams. We turns out and saw that a medium-sized snake is crawling over there. We got goose bumps at that moment, and we just running, but a snake was crawling over there too! We were so scared, and we sat down and cried, and in the end the mothers took us to the security room, and we know that they were a snake toy that a baby was played with them, and we went home with sweat instead of a picnic.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Happy Sunday Maria!

What a prank! Even I would be terrified just like you if I would see snakes scattered anywhere. If you try to think of it, it is actually funny yet, you took it seriously. Nonetheless, I am glad that it was fake and that you were not hurt. Well, better camp next time!

I will see you soon!

-T. Donna =)

I can't remember all of their names, but the names of my best friends are Christina and James. 
>> Correct!

Christina and James were the first friends I made that come the United States, and they were lemon-bans like peninsula, so I was able to get along more closely. 
>>Christina and James were the first friends I made in the United States, and they were my first international friends, so I was able to get along with them more closely. 

My mother was also close to Christina and James's mother, so I could see it often with them. 
>> Correct!

One day, Christina's mom ask to my mom to go on a picnic with James! 
>> One day, Christina's mom asked my mom to go on a picnic with James! 

So, we quickly wrapped up and went on a picnic.
>> Correct! 

But as soon as we arrive, someone screams. 
>> But as soon as we arrived, someone screamed. 

We turns out and saw that a medium-sized snake is crawling over there. 
>> We went out and saw that a medium-sized snake is crawling over there. 

We got goose bumps at that moment, and we just running, but a snake was crawling over there too! 
>> We got goose bumps at that moment, and we just ran, but a snake was crawling over there too! 

We were so scared, and we sat down and cried, and in the end the mothers took us to the security room, and we know that they were a snake toy that a baby was played with them, and we went home with sweat instead of a picnic.
>> We were so scared, and we sat down and cried. In the end, the mothers took us to the security room, and we knew that they were snake toys that a baby was playing with. We went home sweaty instead of a picnic.
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03
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