¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What are the benefits of traveling?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*±¹
2021-05-23 1007

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

There are many things one can gain from traveling new places. We can get new friends, new stories, and new experiences. When we start to travel other places, we get better understanding about peoples living there, including their culture, and background. I think that one of the main benefits of travelling is relaxing from daily routine. We all have many stress and tension in our lives. Travelling forces us to temporarily disconnect from our normal routine.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Sir Mandeep!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

There are many things one can gain from traveling new places. 
>> CORRECT!

We can get new friends, new stories, and new experiences. 
>> CORRECT!
OR >> We can make new friends, new stories, and new experiences. 

When we start to travel other places, we get better understanding about peoples living there, including their culture, and background. 
>> When we start to travel other places, we get better understanding about people living there, including their culture, and background. 

I think that one of the main benefits of travelling is relaxing from daily routine. 
>> CORRECT!

We all have many stress and tension in our lives. 
>> CORRECT!

Travelling forces us to temporarily disconnect from our normal routine.
>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
108771 Cultures and traditions are different in each country so what... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-05-23 0
108770 What are the positive impacts of the COVID-19 pandemic? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-05-23 0
108769 My favorite golf. ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-23 1
108768 Are Koreans good at managing stress? À¯*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-23 680
108767 Have you ever seen someone \"walked out\" in a meeting because... À¯*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-23 533
108766 What part of your country would you ideally like to live in? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-23 1
108765 What do you think makes \"A house\" into \"A home\"? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-23 1
108764 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-23 570
108763 What are the benefits of traveling? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-23 1007
108762 Wrongfully convicted US brothers who spent 31 years in prison to... À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-05-23 1
108761 Homework ±è*±â ¿Ï·á 2021-05-22 1
108760 Homework ±è*±â ¿Ï·á 2021-05-22 3
108759 How is beauty defines in your culture? ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-22 556
108758 What\'s your most valued possession? ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-22 603
108757 Does struggling for something make you strive for more or makes... À¯*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-22 621
108756 Do you struggle with your timetable these days? À¯*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-22 661
108755 Do you personally teach your teammates how to handle work... À¯*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-22 666
108754 Do you have high expectations for the team you work with? À¯*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-22 579
108753 Um...mabye the story will be scary..... ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-05-22 574
108752 why is doing volunteer work important? ±è*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-05-22 652

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04