¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

If you can sell anything from your valuable things, what would it be and why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-05-25 516

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

If I can sell anything from my valuable things, I will sell my toys that I played when I was a kid.
There is lots of toys that I played when I was a kid in my room.
And now, I don't play with that toys anymore because I am arleady a students of middle school.
So I don't need it, and my brother don't need it because he is a students of middle school next year.
So if I can sell anything from my valuable things, I will sell my toys that I played when I was a kid.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi JOHN!

Wow, that's quite hard to do for some people. Very impressive :) 

As well as being useful, our possessions represent our extended selves. They provide a sense of past and tell us ¡°who we are, where we have come from and perhaps where we are going.

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

If I can sell anything from my valuable things, I will sell my toys that I played when I was a kid.
>> CORRECT

There is lots of toys that I played when I was a kid in my room.
>>There are lots of toys that I played with in my room when I was a kid.

And now, I don't play with that toys anymore because I am arleady a students of middle school.
>> And now, I don't play with them anymore because I am already in middle school.

So I don't need it, and my brother don't need it because he is a students of middle school next year.
>> Both me and my brother don't play with it anymore because we're both in middle school. 

So if I can sell anything from my valuable things, I will sell my toys that I played when I was a kid.
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
108346 Yes...but the reason is too bad..¤Ì¤Ì ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 598
108345 If you were on a deserted island, what would you bring and why? ±è*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 618
108344 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 0
108343 Why do wear shous? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 536
108342 How did your parents raise you? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 547
108341 Monday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 530
108340 late flight ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 2
108339 Some people think that the best way to increase road safety is... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 490
108338 What do you and your family like to do together ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 429
108337 Homework 5.10 Àå*º° ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 576
108336 Do you like making friends with other people? ¼Û*·É ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 456
108335 How life was in Seoul during your studies in Medical School. ¿À*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 550
108334 How did your parents raise you? ÃÖ*¿Á ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 2
108333 Homework ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 1
108332 question ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 584
108331 Writing task ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 503
108330 Homework ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 538
108329 How did your parents raise you? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 0
108328 continue.. 2-2 ÃÖ*¾È ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 588
108327 Should all the university students study subjects such as... ÃÖ*¾È ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04