¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¼º
2021-05-25 549

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

What are some of your bad habits and how do you think are you going to get rid of it?

My bad habits are, not doing work out at all and having dinner very late. As my work finished late even after 10 pm, I have dinner around midnight sometimes. Even in this situation, I felt well when I was in the 20s but recently I feel my health is getting worse as I'm already in the 30s. So, trying to have dinner in the company before 7 pm if my work is going to be finished late. And also before I entered my company, I used to play basketball and go to the mountains. However, nowadays I feel tired all the time, so I just try to take a rest on my day off. Since I started my work the first time, I gained a lot of weight. So, I think I have to find a way to release the stress from the work and do some workout as much as possible.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Homer!

Most of the time, bad habits are simply a way of dealing with stress and boredom. Everything from biting your nails to overspending on a shopping spree to drinking every weekend to wasting time on the internet can be a simple response to stress and boredom.

But it doesn't have to be that way. You can teach yourself new and healthy ways to deal with stress and boredom, which you can then substitute in place of your bad habits.

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.


My bad habits are, not doing work out at all and having dinner very late. 
>> My bad habits are not working out and having dinner very late at night. 

As my work finished late even after 10 pm, I have dinner around midnight sometimes. 
>> Even if my work finishes at 10pm, I will have dinner around midnight sometimes. 

Even in this situation, I felt well when I was in the 20s but recently I feel my health is getting worse as I'm already in the 30s. 
>> Even now, I still feel like I'm in my 20's but I realize that my health is getting worse as I am already in my 30's. 

So, trying to have dinner in the company before 7 pm if my work is going to be finished late. 
>> So, I try to have dinner at the company by 7pm if I am going to work late. 

And also before I entered my company, I used to play basketball and go to the mountains. 
>> Before I entered my company, I used to play basketball and go hiking. 

However, nowadays I feel tired all the time, so I just try to take a rest on my day off. 
>> However, nowadays I feel tired all the time so I just try to take a rest on my day offs. 

Since I started my work the first time, I gained a lot of weight. 
>> Since I started working, I gained a lot of weight. 

So, I think I have to find a way to release the stress from the work and do some workout as much as possible.
>> So, I think I have to find a way to release the stress from work and do some workout as much as possible.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
109472 Homework ÀÓ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-18 396
109471 6/16 homework ³ª*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-06-18 553
109470 Task ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-18 472
109469 What is a mistake that you would want to repeat? ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-18 517
109468 HW ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-06-18 442
109467 What would you like to know about your country? ÇÏ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-18 424
109466 Are you currently raising a pet? If not, have you ever thought... ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 458
109465 homework ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 3
109464 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 430
109463 HOMEWORK ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 415
109462 The most livable in my country ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 1
109461 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 418
109460 Homework Ç¥*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 4
109459 I want to be a cat! Among the small ones. ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 441
109458 What Korean policy/law do you think should be removed? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 493
109457 What do you consider in buying a house or apartment? ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 372
109456 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 400
109455 What do you need to do, so you could do a half day at work? ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 465
109454 HW ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 0
109453 What Korean policy/law do you think should be removed? ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 397

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04