¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*¿¬
2021-05-31 509

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

HOMEWORK:
When you are stressed, how do you feel physically?

When I'm stressed, my mind is very complicated and annoyed a lot.
And this also affect on my physical things too. I usually eat a lot when I'm stressed. Because of this habit, I will be fatter.
So if I grow fat, including everyone, our health will destroyed sooner. According to many scientists, they says stress might be harmful for our physical, and the brain health. It's more harmless for growing up children. Stress can affect on our growing too.
Also, if we frown a lot, than our impressions will look bad. However stress is no good for us and our health.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Claire!
thank you for always being diligent in submitting your writing. See you tomorrow! ^^
~~Teacher Kate

When I'm stressed, my mind is very complicated and annoyed a lot.
>>CORRECT!
And this also affect on my physical things too. 
>>And this also affects my physical state too. 
I usually eat a lot when I'm stressed. Because of this habit, I will be fatter.
>>CORRECT!
So if I grow fat, including everyone, our health will destroyed sooner.
>>So if I, along with everyone else, grow fatter, our health will deteriorate. 
According to many scientists, they says stress might be harmful for our physical, and the brain health.
>>According to many scientists, stress might be harmful for our physical and mental health.
It's more harmless for growing up children. Stress can affect on our growing too.
>>It's more harmful to growing children. Stress can affect our growth too. 
Also, if we frown a lot, than our impressions will look bad. 
>>Also, if we frown a lot, other people's impression on us will be bad. 
However stress is no good for us and our health.
>>CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
110047 what do I do in the perfect weather? ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 589
110046 Hello!! ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 4
110045 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 0
110044 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 481
110043 It\'s so difficult to solve all of this...^^;; ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 394
110042 Email ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 421
110041 Email ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 471
110040 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 485
110039 Where do you want to travel in future and why? ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 635
110038 Verses Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 418
110037 Why do you think is it harder for old people to accept change? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 371
110036 A hot day ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 2
110035 HOMEWORK ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 598
110034 Homework ¾ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 0
110033 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 415
110032 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 586
110031 Wednesday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 589
110030 Does everyone have equal job opportunities in your country? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 504
110029 What other letter sounds do you have difficulty with? ÃÖ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 618
110028 Is junk food good for your health? Why? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-07-14 570

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04