¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¼º
2021-05-31 414

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Do you think it's good to share photos on social media? Why or why not?

I don't think it's not good to share our photos on social media. Once I upload my photos online, unknown people are able to access to see my posting, and it won't be deleted permanently unless I delete it by myself. However, as we are living in a flood of information, it's very difficult to memorize every our history online. So in some cases, there will be a situation that I didn't even remember, and it will be consequences left behind.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Homer!

Posting pictures in social media has been a very common activity for most of us. We share to other people the things that we do and experience everyday. At some point, it is a form of socializing and expression. Although, there should be limits because even the people whom we don't know personally can see our posts. We have to be vigilant and we should think before we click :) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

I don't think it's not good to share our photos on social media. 
>> CORRECT

Once I upload my photos online, unknown people are able to access to see my posting, and it won't be deleted permanently unless I delete it by myself.
>> Once I upload my photos online, unknown people are able to access to look on my posts and they won't be deleted permanently unless I delete it by myself.

However, as we are living in a flood of information, it's very difficult to memorize every our history online. 
>>However, as we are living in a place where there's constant information, it's very difficult to memorize our history through online.

So in some cases, there will be a situation that I didn't even remember, and it will be consequences left behind.
>> So in some cases, there will be a situation that I didn't even remember something, and there would be consequences. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
109858 Trust ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 345
109857 Have a good day Queeny! ¿À*¸° ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 313
109856 What is the first thing that you always do when you visit a new... ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 288
109855 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 348
109854 Do I like small talk? ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 382
109853 HOMEWORK ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 324
109852 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 1
109851 Give me one festival in your hometown that you enjoy the most. ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 293
109850 What are the advantages and disadvantages of working with a... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 2
109849 My favorite sweets treats are Twix, and ABC chocolate. ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 349
109848 What do you like most about Korea? ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 306
109847 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 321
109846 Homework ½É*»ó ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 298
109845 What is the first thing that you always do when you visit a new... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 326
109844 What is the first thing that you always do when you visit a new... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 0
109843 Is getting angry an effective way of dealing with problems? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 2
109842 Homework Ç¥*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 6
109841 How Tattos Went Mainstream in Korea À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 1
109840 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 1
109839 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04