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영작교정 게시판

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Friday homework

작성자: 류*우
2021-06-04 437

회원님의 영작문

Q:What would happen if they will all develop the parks into buildings?
A:If people all develop the parks into buildings, then people, who lives near the park, will be angry.
First, if they all develop the parks into buildings, then benchs in park will removed by them, so people, who lives near park will be angry.
Second, if they do it, people, who lives near the park, cannot walk in the park even it's sunny, so the apartment villagers will be angry.
Lastly, if they do it, then some people can live in the new apartment, but the villagers who lives near the park, can be angry, so it's not good for everyone.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello Paul,

  Thank you for taking time to answer this question. It only proves that you really wanted to improve in your English skill. Please do check and take note of the corrections for your improvement. I hope it helped you. 

Keep up the good work!

Sincerely,
Teacher Annie (^^)



Q: What would happen if they will all develop the parks into buildings?

A: If people all develop the parks into buildings, then people, who lives near the park, will be angry.
>>> If people develop all the parks into buildings, then people who live near the park will get angry.

First, if they all develop the parks into buildings, then benchs in park will removed by them, so people, who lives near park will be angry.
>>> First, if they develop all the parks into buildings, then benches in the park will be removed, so the people living near the park will be angry because they will no longer have benches to sit in.

Second, if they do it, people, who lives near the park, cannot walk in the park even it's sunny, so the apartment villagers will be angry.
>>> Second, if they do it, then the people who live near them cannot walk in the park even if it's sunny, so the apartment villagers will be angry.

Lastly, if they do it, then some people can live in the new apartment, but the villagers who lives near the park, can be angry, so it's not good for everyone.
>>> Lastly, if they do it, then some people can live in the newly built apartments, but the villagers who live near the park which were eliminated will be angry, so it's not good for everyone.

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