¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Would you rather give money to beggars or buskers? Why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*¿ø
2021-06-04 333

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think it¡¯s okay give money to beggars or buskers.
because buskers receive money by showing their talents to people on the street. and I think it¡¯s okay give money to beggars. because what he started begging on the street is he really very hard. so if I have ability I can help somebody, I help by giving money to beggars or buskers.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Won!

With more people suffering from homelessness, the general public may feel they wish to give cash to those sleeping rough. But some people say that handing over money to beggars "can have fatal consequences".

In terms of buskers, these are entertainers. They are pretty much the same with other entertainers you see on television. If one has entertained you, you can definitely give them money if you can. They did something that can benefit you, which is to entertain you. 

PS: Omg, you had a terrible experience. I feel so sorry to hear that :(

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

I think it¡¯s okay give money to beggars or buskers.
>> CORRECT

because buskers receive money by showing their talents to people on the street. 
>> It's because buskers receive money by showing their talents to the people on the street. 

and I think it¡¯s okay give money to beggars. because what he started begging on the street is he really very hard. \
>> And I also think that giving money to beggars is okay because they in a very hard situation. 

so if I have ability I can help somebody, I help by giving money to beggars or buskers.
>> So If I have the ability to help other people, I would do so by giving money to beggars or buskers. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
109220 A failure what has made me more better. ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-09 277
109219 What technology are you fascinated about if not cars and motors? ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-06-08 1
109218 The holidays should have be more, or less? ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-08 327
109217 Key figure behind sex abuse ring appeals sentence to Supreme... À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-08 1
109216 Homework (300) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-08 299
109215 Are there any countries you could never see yourself living in? ÀÓ*ÃÑ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-08 320
109214 What problems do fire causes in today\'s world? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-08 1
109213 [06/02] ¹Ú*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2021-06-08 1
109212 Any countries ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-08 3
109211 Yes! the goals can change your life! ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-06-08 336
109210 spicy food. ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-08 362
109209 Home work ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-06-08 272
109208 Are the drinking and driving laws in your country too strict?... È«*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-08 1
109207 HOMEWORK ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-06-08 458
109206 HOMEWORK ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-06-08 334
109205 Is voting an important responsibility of a citizen? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-08 1
109204 What do you think should the government of South Korea focus on? ÀÌ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-08 287
109203 Who are the 3 people in your life that you can\'t live without? ÀÌ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-08 304
109202 thank you, Rina gw* yoonah ¿Ï·á 2021-06-08 304
109201 School ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-06-08 292

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04