¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¼º
2021-06-07 315

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

What do you think should the government of South Korea focus on?

I think the Korean government should reduce wasted financial amount of welfare. There are lots of policies to support underprivileged people. However, since the criteria of selecting applicants, is not very precise, unnecessary people are exploiting those policies despite they don't really need to get help. So, I hope the Korean government set and check more specifically before conducting welfare policies.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Homer!

Governments in emerging economies have, over the decades, tried many different policy agendas to stimulate development, accelerate growth, alleviate poverty, and achieve any number of other goals to mixed success. Nowadays, the urgent problem is regarding the pandemic. They work really hard on how to improve their country and their people as well. Your ideas are great. Thanks for sharing. :) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.


I think the Korean government should reduce wasted financial amount of welfare. 
>> I think the Korean government should reduce financial waste on welfare. 

There are lots of policies to support underprivileged people. 
>> CORRECT

However, since the criteria of selecting applicants, is not very precise, unnecessary people are exploiting those policies despite they don't really need to get help. 
>> However, since the criteria of selecting applicants is not very precise, unnecessary people are exploiting those policies despite the fact that they don't need any help. 

So, I hope the Korean government set and check more specifically before conducting welfare policies.
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
108757 Does struggling for something make you strive for more or makes... À¯*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-22 499
108756 Do you struggle with your timetable these days? À¯*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-22 580
108755 Do you personally teach your teammates how to handle work... À¯*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-22 632
108754 Do you have high expectations for the team you work with? À¯*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-22 541
108753 Um...mabye the story will be scary..... ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-05-22 522
108752 why is doing volunteer work important? ±è*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-05-22 547
108751 Homework🍩 ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-05-22 643
108750 What do you say when you want to invite someone to your party? ÃÖ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-05-22 541
108749 Homework ÀÓ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-22 570
108748 homework ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-05-22 4
108747 HOMEWORK ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 806
108746 HOMEWORK ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 539
108745 Homework (288) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 845
108744 How is beauty defined in your culture? ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 528
108743 Do you think sending your loved ones to nursing homes is a kind... ÃÖ*¿Á ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 0
108742 What are the positive impacts of the COVID-19 pandemic? ÃÖ*¿Á ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 0
108741 Are there any hobbies you would like to try? ÀÌ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 1036
108740 homework of monday ±è*±¸ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 911
108739 ultures and traditions are different in each country so what... ÃÖ*¿Á ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 0
108738 How is beauty defined in your culture? ÀÌ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 656

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04