¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¼º
2021-06-07 400

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

What do you think should the government of South Korea focus on?

I think the Korean government should reduce wasted financial amount of welfare. There are lots of policies to support underprivileged people. However, since the criteria of selecting applicants, is not very precise, unnecessary people are exploiting those policies despite they don't really need to get help. So, I hope the Korean government set and check more specifically before conducting welfare policies.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Homer!

Governments in emerging economies have, over the decades, tried many different policy agendas to stimulate development, accelerate growth, alleviate poverty, and achieve any number of other goals to mixed success. Nowadays, the urgent problem is regarding the pandemic. They work really hard on how to improve their country and their people as well. Your ideas are great. Thanks for sharing. :) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.


I think the Korean government should reduce wasted financial amount of welfare. 
>> I think the Korean government should reduce financial waste on welfare. 

There are lots of policies to support underprivileged people. 
>> CORRECT

However, since the criteria of selecting applicants, is not very precise, unnecessary people are exploiting those policies despite they don't really need to get help. 
>> However, since the criteria of selecting applicants is not very precise, unnecessary people are exploiting those policies despite the fact that they don't need any help. 

So, I hope the Korean government set and check more specifically before conducting welfare policies.
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
108356 homework ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 646
108355 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 696
108354 Personally, do you think people can really stop using plastic?... ±Ç*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 588
108353 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 973
108352 Did you know that Abraham Lincoln supposedly foresaw his own... Ȳ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 703
108351 Do you walk every day? ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 980
108350 Homework 5.10.MON ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 678
108349 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 692
108348 Homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 3
108347 Staying in Hanok ÁÖ*³ª ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 1112
108346 Yes...but the reason is too bad..¤Ì¤Ì ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 761
108345 If you were on a deserted island, what would you bring and why? ±è*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 798
108344 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 0
108343 Why do wear shous? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 736
108342 How did your parents raise you? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 674
108341 Monday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 690
108340 late flight ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 2
108339 Some people think that the best way to increase road safety is... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 679
108338 What do you and your family like to do together ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 612
108337 Homework 5.10 Àå*º° ¿Ï·á 2021-05-10 748

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04