¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Tuesday Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*¿ì
2021-06-08 512

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Q:What could be the effect of music on humans?
A:The effects of music on humans is music can make different how humans feel like.
First, if a human listen to a cheerful music, then the human feels good, but he listen to sad music hr feels not that good.
Second, some humans try to be good at playing music is one of effects of music on humans too.
Some human think if he is good at playing music, then many people will accept his skill, so some human try to be good at playing music.
Last, I think music gave a lot of gladness to humans and it gave a lot of good effects to humans.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Paul,

  Thank you for taking time to answer this question. It only proves that you really wanted to improve in your English skill. Please do check and take note of the corrections for your improvement. I hope it helped you. 

Keep up the good work!

Sincerely,
Teacher Annie (^^)



Q: What could be the effect of music on humans?

A: The effects of music on humans is music can make different how humans feel like.
>>> One of the effects of music on humans is that it could affect the feelings of the people listening to it. 

First, if a human listen to a cheerful music, then the human feels good, but he listen to sad music hr feels not that good.
>>> First, if a human listen to cheerful music, then he will feel good, but if he listens to sad music then he will feel sad or emotional. 

Second, some humans try to be good at playing music is one of effects of music on humans too.
>>> Second, some people try to be good at playing a musical instrument or in the music itself, it's one of the effects of music on us humans. 

Some human think if he is good at playing music, then many people will accept his skill, so some human try to be good at playing music.
>>> Some humans think that if they are good at playing music, then many people will like and appreciate their skill, so some human try to be good at music.

Last, I think music gave a lot of gladness to humans and it gave a lot of good effects to humans.
>>> Lastly, I think music gives a lot of gladness, happiness to humans and it gives a lot of good effects too.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
111744 About my house ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2021-09-08 472
111743 divorce ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-08 422
111742 homework for 09.08 ye*nhi ¿Ï·á 2021-09-08 1
111741 Are there any sweet foods from your country that you\'d... ±è*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-08 870
111740 28th homework Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-08 1
111739 Speaking of goal ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-08 5
111738 What is your opinion about the resuming of in-person classes in... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-08 0
111737 Nowadays more and more people want to get things done instantly.... ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-08 423
111736 What is the best place in Florida you\'ve been to when you lived... ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-08 1
111735 What are your plans for tomorrow? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-09-08 382
111734 Please compare the healthcare system of America and South Korea. ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-08 461
111733 How would you describe a perfect weekend? ¼­*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-08 453
111732 What do you think of the job opportunities available in Korea? Çã*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-09-08 0
111731 Homework ½Å*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-08 1
111730 ¼÷Á¦ ±è*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-08 533
111729 If you could change any aspect of your personality, what would... ¹Ú*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-08 470
111728 What do you think will make man go extinct? ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-08 5
111727 special gift ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-08 5
111726 If I will visit your city, what restaurant would you recommend... ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-07 622
111725 Thank you! ¿ì*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-09-07 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04