¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¼º
2021-06-12 392

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Do you think change is good? Why or why not?

Change can be interpreted in very various ways, but in general, I think it's necessary to make a situation better. As we are not perfect in every part, our decision can't be ideal always. So, improving the lowlights, we need to focus on review and find insight.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Homer! ^^

Change can teach us to adapt and help us develop resilience, but only if we understand our own capacity for growth and learning. When change makes us better, it's because we have learned how to turn a challenging situation to our own advantage, not merely because change happens.

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

Change can be interpreted in very various ways, but in general, I think it's necessary to make a situation better. 
>>CORRECT

As we are not perfect in every part, our decision can't be ideal always. 
>> CORRECT

So, improving the lowlights, we need to focus on review and find insight.
>> So ,in improving the lowlights, we need to focus in finding the insights. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
109163 Holloween Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 272
109162 What do you think should the government of South Korea focus on? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 288
109161 More and more people are finding it increasingly important to... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 291
109160 Monday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 282
109159 Homework ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 328
109158 Tell me about the food delivery system in Korea. ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 0
109157 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 3
109156 HOMEWORK:ESSAY: Choose one experience in a restaurant and... ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 3
109155 HOMEWORK : How can you describe your city for foreigners to... ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 1
109154 There are several lessons I\'ve learned in life. ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 282
109153 Homework ±è*È¿ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 290
109152 Homework. ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 285
109151 Home work ±è*È¿ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 289
109150 Homework ±è*È¿ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 304
109149 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 1
109148 Homework ÀÓ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 355
109147 Interview 4 ±Ç*½Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 0
109146 Do you mind sharing your problems with your friends? ÇÏ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 287
109145 What do people use as source of light when there\'s a power... ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-06 2
109144 I think Zeus is the powerful person in our world. ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-06-06 379

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04