¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¼º
2021-06-12 558

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Do you think change is good? Why or why not?

Change can be interpreted in very various ways, but in general, I think it's necessary to make a situation better. As we are not perfect in every part, our decision can't be ideal always. So, improving the lowlights, we need to focus on review and find insight.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Homer! ^^

Change can teach us to adapt and help us develop resilience, but only if we understand our own capacity for growth and learning. When change makes us better, it's because we have learned how to turn a challenging situation to our own advantage, not merely because change happens.

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

Change can be interpreted in very various ways, but in general, I think it's necessary to make a situation better. 
>>CORRECT

As we are not perfect in every part, our decision can't be ideal always. 
>> CORRECT

So, improving the lowlights, we need to focus on review and find insight.
>> So ,in improving the lowlights, we need to focus in finding the insights. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
109834 What are the ways people with problems sleeping can do to help... ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 569
109833 What annoys you about yourself? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 1
109832 Who are you named after? What is the meaning of your name? ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-07-06 503
109831 Is poverty a reason to commit crime? ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-05 1
109830 To faith ³ë*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-05 1
109829 Where do you usually get your news from? ÃÖ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-07-05 446
109828 Chocolate that attracts people ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-05 532
109827 Is it necessary to have a goal? Why do you say so? ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-07-05 617
109826 In 10 years\' time, ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-05 1
109825 How do you think is public transportation going to change in the... ÃÖ*¿Á ¿Ï·á 2021-07-05 0
109824 Do you think playing video games are bad for kids? Why or why... ÃÖ*¿Á ¿Ï·á 2021-07-05 0
109823 Give me one festival in your hometown that you enjoy the most. ÃÖ*¿Á ¿Ï·á 2021-07-05 0
109822 My health condition ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-07-05 553
109821 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-05 1
109820 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-05 0
109819 email 5 of July. ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-05 484
109818 email(5 of July) ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-05 434
109817 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-05 409
109816 Homework {07/05} Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-07-05 458
109815 My favorite junk food is Pasta! ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-07-05 829

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04