¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Some people believe that individuals are becoming more and more dependent on each other, where as ot

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2021-06-14 285

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think that people are becoming more dependent but they feel lonely. The family have became smaller than before and there are more people who are not planning to get married. Many people prefer to live alone because they don't want to be bothered by children and a partner. So, people have learnt cooking, cleaning and doing laundry by themselves. This is positive aspects because they can do anything without parents. However, there are a lot of free time and they don't know what they have to do, especially on weekends. Although, there are a lot of online clubs which are gathered the same interests, we can't enjoy it fully when we have joined there because members in the clubs are not their family and friends who have been known for a long time. I guess that human would like to have close people such as family ultimately.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Mr. Hwang~! ^^ It's so gloomy here. I have blues now. Anyway, I'm still awesome! Hahaha! How's your day going? Tell me tomorrow! :D See you!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I think that people are becoming more independent but they feel lonely. 
>>> CORRECT
The family have became smaller than before and there are more people who are not planning to get married.
>>> CORRECT
Many people prefer to live alone because they don't want to be bothered by children and their partner.
>>> CORRECT
 So, people have learnt cooking, cleaning and doing laundry by themselves.
>>> CORRECT
 This is positive aspects because they can do anything without parents.
>>>  These are positive aspects because they can do anything without their parents.
 However, there are a lot of free time and they don't know what they have to do, especially on weekends. 
>>> CORRECT
Although, there are a lot of online clubs which are gathered the same interests, we can't enjoy it fully when we have joined there because members in the clubs are not their family and friends who have been known for a long time.
>>> Although, there are a lot of online clubs which gather the same interests. We can't enjoy it fully when we join on it because members in the clubs are not family members and friends who they have known for a long time.
 I guess that human would like to have close people such as family ultimately.
>>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
109349 My homework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 309
109348 Homework. ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 244
109347 Do you think change is good? Çã*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 0
109346 Is voting an important responsibility of a citizen? Çã*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 0
109345 tell me about your city ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 246
109344 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 1
109343 Homework😀 ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 250
109342 Celebrities call on G7 to share vaccines with poor nation À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 2
109341 Korean Open More Stock Accounts Than Bank Accounts À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 2
109340 Please use them in a sentence: ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 2
109339 Homework ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 252
109338 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 1
109337 Have you ever suffered from insomnia? º¯*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 2
109336 What kind of business do want to set up? ÇÏ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-14 237
109335 Plan to expand substitute holiday system gaining traction À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-13 1
109334 South Korea confirms 5 more breakthrough infections, total now... À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-13 1
109333 Do you think that a person\'s eating habits affect how long they... ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-13 5
109332 what is your favorite food, why? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-13 3
109331 Do you want to change your skin color? ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-13 303
109330 Love À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-13 245

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04