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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Describe an activity that keeps you healthy while you enjoy

작성자: 유*솔
2021-06-14 389

회원님의 영작문

I usually do excercise in gym using machines such as rawing machine. I go there near my house alone after work. I really hated to do excercise before. However I got personal training following recommendation of my friend. The coach trained how should I use machines in a right position. I learned way to use more than 10 types of machines. After three months, I realized some changes in my body. The amount of muscle increased while fat decreased. The outfit was changed so it looked good. Although I didn't loose a lot of weight, it was really worth it to bring out interest. Also it is quite good that each machine stimulate different part of body. Until now I go gym and do exercise for an hour. Sometimes it is really painful but I can feel of achivement. I think doing an exercise is good for your not just health but mental.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi Sol,
Regular physical activity can improve your muscle strength and boost your endurance. Exercise delivers oxygen and nutrients to your tissues and helps your cardiovascular system work more efficiently. And when your heart and lung health improve, you have more energy to tackle daily chores. Stay Healthy. ~ Teacher Quenny

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Describe an activity that keeps you healthy while you enjoy
>>Describe an activity that keeps you healthy while you enjoy it.
I usually do excercise in gym using machines such as rawing machine.
>>I usually do exercise in the gym using machines such as rowing machines.
 I go there near my house alone after work. 
>> I go to that gym near my house alone after work. 
I really hated to do excercise before.
>>I really hated to do exercise before. 
 However I got personal training following recommendation of my friend. 
>> However, I got personal training following the recommendation of my friend. 
The coach trained how should I use machines in a right position.
>>The coach trained me on how should I use the machines in the right position.
 I learned way to use more than 10 types of machines.
>> I learned the way how to use more than 10 types of machines.
 After three months, I realized some changes in my body. 
>> After three months, I realized some changes in my body. 
The amount of muscle increased while fat decreased. 
>>The amount of my muscle increased while the fat decreased. 
The outfit was changed so it looked good. 
>>The outfit was changed so it looked good. 
Although I didn't loose a lot of weight, it was really worth it to bring out interest. 
>>Although I didn't lose a lot of weight, it was really worth it to bring out interest. 
Also it is quite good that each machine stimulate different part of body. 
>>Also, it is quite good that each machine stimulates a different part of the body. 
Until now I go gym and do exercise for an hour. 
>>Until now I go to the gym and do exercise for an hour. 
Sometimes it is really painful but I can feel of achivement.
>>Sometimes it is really painful but I can feel the achievement.
 I think doing an exercise is good for your not just health but mental.
>> I think doing exercise is good not only for your health but also mental capability. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Describe an activity that keeps you healthy while you enjoy

I usually do excercise in gym using machines such as rawing machine. I go there near my house alone after work. I really hated to do excercise before. However I got personal training following recommendation of my friend. The coach trained how should I use machines in a right position. I learned way to use more than 10 types of machines. After three months, I realized some changes in my body. The amount of muscle increased while fat decreased. The outfit was changed so it looked good. Although I didn't loose a lot of weight, it was really worth it to bring out interest. Also it is quite good that each machine stimulate different part of body. Until now I go gym and do exercise for an hour. Sometimes it is really painful but I can feel of achivement. I think doing an exercise is good for your not just health but mental.
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