¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What would you say is the best thing about getting older? Why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-06-15 327

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think looking the world more maturely is the best thing about getting older.
We can experience something, and if we are older than before, we can experience things more.
If we experience the things that are in this world, we can think more about this world,
and finally, we can think something more maturely.
So I think the best thing about getting older is looking the world matyrely.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John! ^^

There are some people who would want to stay young but some don't. Sometimes the best part of being a grown up is actually just that: being an adult. It's the personal and financial success that comes from maturity, the freedom of adulthood, the respect you get from your peers and the joy of working hard to play hard

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

I think looking the world more maturely is the best thing about getting older.
>>I think looking at the world more maturely is the best thing about getting older.

We can experience something, and if we are older than before, we can experience things more.
>> We can experience a lot of things and we can gain more as well. 

If we experience the things that are in this world, we can think more about this world,
and finally, we can think something more maturely.
>> If we experience a lot of things, we can think more critically and more maturely. 

So I think the best thing about getting older is looking the world matyrely.
>>So I think the best thing about getting older is looking at the world more maturely. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
109250 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-06-09 295
109249 ÈÞ°­¿äûÇÕ´Ï´Ù ±è*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-09 272
109248 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-06-09 274
109247 Do people drive well in your country? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-09 3
109246 How do you define beauty, using your own words? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-09 1
109245 Work email ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-09 257
109244 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-09 3
109243 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-09 0
109242 Homework ¹Ú*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2021-06-09 276
109241 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-06-09 246
109240 Should parents be held responsible for their children\'s... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-09 301
109239 Wednesday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-06-09 302
109238 Should parents be held responsible for their children\'s... Çã*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-06-09 1
109237 Homework ÀÓ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-09 283
109236 What is something you hate doing when you get home from work or... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-09 0
109235 Who are the 3 people in your life that you can\'t live without?... ÃÖ*¿Á ¿Ï·á 2021-06-09 0
109234 What do you think should the government of South Korea focus on? ÃÖ*¿Á ¿Ï·á 2021-06-09 0
109233 Homework🌈 ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-06-09 224
109232 What are the things that people used to do before but not... ÃÖ*¿Á ¿Ï·á 2021-06-09 0
109231 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-09 277

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04