¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

The best thing of our country

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À¯*Áø
2021-06-16 312

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

At first, our county has many beautiful mountains , long rivers and distinctive four seasons.
There are very active walking people that it has the famous department stores,
around the Meayng Dong streets and the Dongdaemoon Market n Seoul. So,
it has a wonderful sea port, cheaper fish market and the biggest one of our country's export port in Pusan

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Mr. Jin!
This is a simple expression of your ideas.
However, you did a great job!
I hope you can continue working hard.^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
At first, our county has many beautiful mountains , long rivers and distinctive four seasons.
>> First, our country has many beautiful mountains, long rivers and distinctive four seasons.
There are very active walking people that it has the famous department stores, around the Meayng Dong streets and the Dongdaemoon Market n Seoul. 
>> There are active and busy places where people could walk around like Myeongdong street and Dongdeamun market in Seoul.
So, it has a wonderful sea port, cheaper fish market and the biggest one of our country's export port in Pusan
>> We also have a wonderful sea port, cheap fish market, and our biggest export point is in Busan. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
109163 Holloween Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 287
109162 What do you think should the government of South Korea focus on? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 332
109161 More and more people are finding it increasingly important to... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 324
109160 Monday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 313
109159 Homework ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 350
109158 Tell me about the food delivery system in Korea. ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 0
109157 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 3
109156 HOMEWORK:ESSAY: Choose one experience in a restaurant and... ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 3
109155 HOMEWORK : How can you describe your city for foreigners to... ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 1
109154 There are several lessons I\'ve learned in life. ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 308
109153 Homework ±è*È¿ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 312
109152 Homework. ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 317
109151 Home work ±è*È¿ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 322
109150 Homework ±è*È¿ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 349
109149 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 1
109148 Homework ÀÓ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 381
109147 Interview 4 ±Ç*½Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 0
109146 Do you mind sharing your problems with your friends? ÇÏ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-07 318
109145 What do people use as source of light when there\'s a power... ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-06 2
109144 I think Zeus is the powerful person in our world. ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-06-06 392

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04