¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿¬
2021-06-16 450

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My greatest gift is my mom and dad because my parents are my everything.
I can't live when without my parents.
Anyone wouldn't live without their parents.
I'm really happy because I can feel that my parents love me.
The way I feel is that my parents look at me is very cozy and friendly.
You can feel it even if you don't look like that.
I really love my parents so much.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Jenny,

  Thank you for taking time to answer this question. It only proves that you really wanted to improve in your English skill. Please do check and take note of the corrections for your improvement. I hope it helped you. 

Keep up the good work! 

Sincerely,
Teacher Annie (^^)



My greatest gift is my mom and dad because my parents are my everything.
>>> CORRECT

I can't live when without my parents.
>>> I can't live without my parents. 

Anyone wouldn't live without their parents.
>>> CORRECT

I'm really happy because I can feel that my parents love me.
>>> CORRECT

The way I feel is that my parents look at me is very cozy and friendly.
>>> The way my parents look at me feels very cozy and friendly. 

You can feel it even if you don't look like that.
>>> You can feel it even if you don't look at them. 

I really love my parents so much.
>>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
108897 tell me about your favorite drink ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-05-27 436
108896 HOMEWORK: Writing Task: What would you say is the cheapest way... È«*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-05-27 864
108895 HOMEWORK: Writing Task: What foods from your country do you... È«*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-05-27 457
108894 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-05-27 3
108893 HOMEWORK: Writing Task: Who are your favorite actors and... È«*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-05-27 506
108892 HOMEWORK: Writing Task: Do people in your town or city often... È«*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-05-27 505
108891 My homework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-05-27 523
108890 Homework ÀÓ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-27 415
108889 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-27 1
108888 Which natural disaster do you fear most and why? Çã*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-05-27 1
108887 Homework 5.27 Àå*º° ¿Ï·á 2021-05-27 539
108886 Challenges improve myself Á¤*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-27 381
108885 Home work! ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-05-27 349
108884 Describe your favorite WEATHER AND SEASON in an essay. º¯*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-27 1
108883 What do you think is the most dangerous crime in the world? º¯*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-27 1
108882 What are some of your bad habits and how do you think are you... ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-27 933
108881 HW-2 ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-05-26 367
108880 homework ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-05-26 4
108879 Homework (291) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-26 570
108878 What are some of your bad habits ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-05-26 444

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04