¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Are you currently raising a pet? If not, have you ever thought of raising one? In your opinion, when

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¼ö
2021-06-17 374

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I¡¯m currently not raising a pet because my brother is allergic to fur. However, I¡¯ve raised hamsters when I was in an elementary school. It was fine to raise them since hamsters lived in their cages. As this experience, I want to raise hamster again. Furthermore, if I¡¯m available for raising a pet, I want to raise a dog or cat because I¡¯ve never experienced.
I think the perfect way to get pets is finding them at abandoned dogs¡¯ shelter. I heard that the more people buy pets at pet shops, the more producers make pets. Pets become tools to earn money. Moreover, people think the lives of animals are not precious. Therefore, adopting at pet shops will help poor animals and cut the bad thought which regards pets as dolls.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thank you for this Ria!

I¡¯m currently not raising a pet because my brother is allergic to fur. 
>>> correct   
However, I¡¯ve raised hamsters when I was in an elementary school. 
>>> However, I¡¯ve raised hamsters when I was in elementary.    
It was fine to raise them since hamsters lived in their cages. 
>>> correct   
As this experience, I want to raise hamster again. 
>>> OR: Due to this experience, I want to raise hamsters again.   
Furthermore, if I¡¯m available for raising a pet, I want to raise a dog or cat because I¡¯ve never experienced.
>>> OR: Furthermore, if I could possibly raise a pet, I want to raise a dog or cat because I¡¯ve never experienced it.   
I think the perfect way to get pets is finding them at abandoned dogs¡¯ shelter. 
>>> correct    
I heard that the more people buy pets at pet shops, the more producers make pets. 
>>> correct   
Pets become tools to earn money. 
>>> correct    
Moreover, people think the lives of animals are not precious. 
>>> correct   
Therefore, adopting at pet shops will help poor animals and cut the bad thought which regards pets as dolls.
>>>  Therefore, adopting at pet shelters will help poor animals and cut the bad thought which regards pets as dolls.  

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
111103 What medical law do you want to be made? Share your answer in a... Á¤*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-22 308
111102 [8/19]Homework ¹Ú*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2021-08-22 1
111101 [8/18]Homework ¹Ú*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2021-08-22 1
111100 Are you an adventurous person? ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-21 2
111099 If you moved to another country, what things would you miss... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-21 0
111098 What festivals do you have in your city? Can you explain what... ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-21 1
111097 What is your favorite look? ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-21 391
111096 home work on Aug 19 ÃÖ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-21 0
111095 My name ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-21 1
111094 home work on Aug 18 ÃÖ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-21 0
111093 2nd homework ±è*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-21 8
111092 What is the hardest thing to cook? ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-08-21 6
111091 Why do some people love eating spicy food? Àü*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-20 345
111090 Do you like to travel to work or to enjoy? Share your answer in... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-20 1105
111089 8.20 homework ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-20 2
111088 53 ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-20 390
111087 If you moved to another country, what things would you miss... ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-20 352
111086 49 ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-20 669
111085 I agree with that ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-08-20 280
111084 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-20 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04