¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Are you currently raising a pet? If not, have you ever thought of raising one? In your opinion, when

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¼ö
2021-06-17 481

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I¡¯m currently not raising a pet because my brother is allergic to fur. However, I¡¯ve raised hamsters when I was in an elementary school. It was fine to raise them since hamsters lived in their cages. As this experience, I want to raise hamster again. Furthermore, if I¡¯m available for raising a pet, I want to raise a dog or cat because I¡¯ve never experienced.
I think the perfect way to get pets is finding them at abandoned dogs¡¯ shelter. I heard that the more people buy pets at pet shops, the more producers make pets. Pets become tools to earn money. Moreover, people think the lives of animals are not precious. Therefore, adopting at pet shops will help poor animals and cut the bad thought which regards pets as dolls.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thank you for this Ria!

I¡¯m currently not raising a pet because my brother is allergic to fur. 
>>> correct   
However, I¡¯ve raised hamsters when I was in an elementary school. 
>>> However, I¡¯ve raised hamsters when I was in elementary.    
It was fine to raise them since hamsters lived in their cages. 
>>> correct   
As this experience, I want to raise hamster again. 
>>> OR: Due to this experience, I want to raise hamsters again.   
Furthermore, if I¡¯m available for raising a pet, I want to raise a dog or cat because I¡¯ve never experienced.
>>> OR: Furthermore, if I could possibly raise a pet, I want to raise a dog or cat because I¡¯ve never experienced it.   
I think the perfect way to get pets is finding them at abandoned dogs¡¯ shelter. 
>>> correct    
I heard that the more people buy pets at pet shops, the more producers make pets. 
>>> correct   
Pets become tools to earn money. 
>>> correct    
Moreover, people think the lives of animals are not precious. 
>>> correct   
Therefore, adopting at pet shops will help poor animals and cut the bad thought which regards pets as dolls.
>>>  Therefore, adopting at pet shelters will help poor animals and cut the bad thought which regards pets as dolls.  

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
108877 How do you spend holidays in Seoul? ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-05-26 2
108876 homework of monday ±è*±¸ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-26 707
108875 What are some of your bad habits and how do you think are you... ÀÌ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-26 631
108874 If you could change your name, what would you change it to? ±è*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-26 571
108873 HOMEWORK Á¤*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-26 0
108872 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-26 0
108871 The best day of the week ÁÖ*³ª ¿Ï·á 2021-05-26 2
108870 The cello concert ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-05-26 534
108869 Which natural disaster do you fear most and why? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-05-26 3
108868 My experience in traffic jam. ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-26 3
108867 What are some of your bad habits and how do you think are you... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-05-26 2
108866 . think ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-05-26 635
108865 Homework {05/26} Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-05-26 524
108864 What are some of your bad habits and how do you think are you... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-26 547
108863 Wednesday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-05-26 544
108862 1st homework JB ¼Û*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-05-26 505
108861 Unusual food. ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-26 488
108860 Actors and actresses ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-26 2
108859 Some people think that it is a waste of time for high school... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-26 585
108858 What are some of your bad habits and how do you think are you... Çã*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-05-26 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04