¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What was the most memorable vacation that you had with your family?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*¿ø
2021-06-23 252

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

When I was 14years old. My family went to the valley, I forgot that valley is where area. My family traveled From morning to evening, arrived at the valley in evening, my father set up a tent nexy together ate meat. I don¡¯t forget the day mood. I feel so happy.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Jeong Won,

  Thank you for taking time to answer this question. It only proves that you really wanted to improve in your English skill. Please do check and take note of the corrections for your improvement. I hope it helped you. 

Keep up the good work!

Sincerely,
Teacher Annie (^^)



What was the most memorable vacation that you had with your family?


When I was 14years old. My family went to the valley, I forgot that valley is where area. 
>>> When I was 14 years old, my family went to a valley but I forgot where the valley is located. 

My family traveled From morning to evening, arrived at the valley in evening, my father set up a tent nexy together ate meat. 
>>> My family traveled from morning to evening, and we arrived at the valley in the evening. My father set up a tent and together we ate meat. 

I don¡¯t forget the day mood. I feel so happy.
>>> I will never forget the mood of that day. I felt so happy that day. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
110342 What has changed in your life since last year? ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 260
110341 What traditional medical practice does your country have? ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 1
110340 Is making eye contact important in your culture? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 360
110339 Writing: What do you think is the safest way to send some... À¯*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 277
110338 Homepoop ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 250
110337 cultures of marriages ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 284
110336 Travle ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 5
110335 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 1
110334 Homework °­*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 1
110333 HOMEWORK ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 212
110332 How do you feel about President Moon Jae-in considering a pardon... ¿ì*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 305
110331 F ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 271
110330 What food would you like to learn how to cook and why? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 0
110329 Which one do you think is better, working in Korea or working in... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 0
110328 Horror Movie....(The Picture is a police university)-there is no... ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 291
110327 My goal ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 2
110326 Which one do you think is better, working in Korea or working in... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 255
110325 What do you think is the color for happiness? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 1
110324 21/07/27 homework ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 1
110323 Whose behavior do you admire the most? Why? ye*nhi ¿Ï·á 2021-07-27 4

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04