¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Monday homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*¿ì
2021-06-28 496

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Q:What's something you don't like about Facebook?
A:I'm not sure things that people do in Facebook, but I think they share their situation in Facebook.
Firstly, if I use Facebook and if I share something bad, and if I regret it, then I'll delete it from the program, but I can't delete it from the user's brain, so it will be not that good.
Secondly, the Facebook users can say something good to me but, they can say something bad, then I'll feel bad, so it isn't good thing for me.
Also, they can use slang in Facebook, so it can give children bad effects, so it should not be used by children.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Paul!

Thank you for doing your homework. :)

I understand that English could be really difficult.

But it only takes faith and confidence in yourself to perfect it.

You are a smart person and I know that with constant practice you will do great¡¦ ^_^

Xoxo,

T. Christina ^^

Here are my corrections for you:


I'm not sure things that people do in Facebook, but I think they share their situation in Facebook.

>> I'm not sure about the things that people do on Facebook, but I think they share their situations on Facebook.
Firstly, if I use Facebook and if I share something bad, and if I regret it, then I'll delete it from the program, but I can't delete it from the user's brain, so it will be not that good.

>> First of all, If I use Facebook and share something bad and regret it after, then I'll delete it but I can't delete it from other users' brains so that won't be good.
Secondly, the Facebook users can say something good to me but, they can say something bad, then I'll feel bad, so it isn't good thing for me.

>> Secondly, other Facebook users can say something good to me but they can also say something bad which would make me feel bad and that isn't a good thing for me.
Also, they can use slang in Facebook, so it can give children bad effects, so it should not be used by children.

>> Also, they can use slang words on Facebook so it can have a bad effect on children so it shouldn't be used by children.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
109790 On working from home, no hoesik, young workers prefer COVID-era... À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-04 1
109789 HOMEWORK ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-03 363
109788 What do you do when you have trouble sleeping ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-03 0
109787 Is there any case of human trafficking in your country? ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-02 1
109786 Hi! Gina ¿ì*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-02 3
109785 Email ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-02 381
109784 Some people think that living in big cities is bad for people¡¯s... ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-02 2
109783 Homework. ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-02 408
109782 Homework. ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-02 455
109781 Are there litter laws where you live? If so, what is the penalty... ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-02 1
109780 Why do people sometimes feel afraid to express their real... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-02 323
109779 What bad habits bother you the most? Àü*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-02 458
109778 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-07-02 2
109777 My homework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-02 828
109776 In some countries young people are not only richer, but also... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-02 445
109775 What foods have you tasted which you will never forget for the... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-02 1
109774 Task ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-02 378
109773 HW ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-07-02 0
109772 HW ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-07-02 0
109771 What are the changes happening in you country now? ÇÏ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-02 380

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04