¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

How do you think can the rich countries help the poor countries?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-06-29 558

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think my country, Korea is little weak with taxation.
In U.S, the citizens pay their income's half for their country as tax.
If Korea citizens pay their income's half as U.S, there will be a lot of money in National Treasury, and we can use that money for the poor country.
So I think if we pay our income's half to our country, we can help the poor countries.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John! ^^

That's actually a good solution but I think a lot of people would be against this because their hard earned money will be offered to other people. :) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

I think my country, Korea is little weak with taxation.
>> In Korea,  which is my country, taxation is a little weak.

In U.S, the citizens pay their income's half for their country as tax.
>> In the US, citizens pay their tax with half their income. 

If Korea citizens pay their income's half as U.S, there will be a lot of money in National Treasury, and we can use that money for the poor country.
>> If this also happens in Korea, there would be more money in the National Treasury and we can use that to help the poor countries. 

So I think if we pay our income's half to our country, we can help the poor countries.
>> So I think if we pay our tax with half of our income, we can help poor countries. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
108738 How is beauty defined in your culture? ÀÌ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 807
108737 homework ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 5
108736 Do you see yourself being a vegetarian in the future? Why or why... ÀÌ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 595
108735 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 1041
108734 Homework 5 / 21 / FRI ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 1111
108733 What would you do if you won the lottery? ÇÏ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 719
108732 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 627
108731 Fluent in English ÁÖ*³ª ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 4
108730 What kind of house or apartment would you like to have? ¼Û*·É ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 813
108729 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 0
108728 If you could only read one more book for your entire life, what... ±è*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 544
108727 How is beauty defined in your culture? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 673
108726 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 546
108725 Computers today can quickly and accurately translate languages,... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 1116
108724 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 0
108723 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 702
108722 Do you think humans will ever be able to stop aging? How? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 927
108721 Homework ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 570
108720 My homework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 631
108719 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-05-21 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04