¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Is it necessary to have a goal? Why do you say so?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¼ö
2021-07-05 561

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think having a goal is important to live. The life without goal makes people be bored and be passive. Because people have their own goals, they could organize their lives more wisely and happily. Goals also motivate people to enjoy their lives. If someone has a goal, s/he would try to achieve it. While s/he accomplishes it, s/he can think about their live and themselves to make better life. Therefore, having goals is crucial to me to live more cheerful.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thank you for this Ria!

I think having a goal is important to live. 
>>> correct   
The life without goal makes people be bored and be passive. 
>>> correct.
>>> OR: A life without a goal makes people bored and passive.   
Because people have their own goals, they could organize their lives more wisely and happily. 
>>> Because if people have their own goals, they could organize their lives more wisely and happily.    
Goals also motivate people to enjoy their lives. 
>>> correct   
If someone has a goal, s/he would try to achieve it. 
>>> correct   
While s/he accomplishes it, s/he can think about their live and themselves to make better life. 
>>>  While s/he accomplishes it, s/he can think about his/her life and herself/himself to make life better.  
Therefore, having goals is crucial to me to live more cheerful.
>>>  correct  

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
109477 When and where do you usually eat out? ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-06-18 446
109476 What\'s the strangest dream you\'ve ever had? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-18 0
109475 What is your favorite holiday? Has your favorite holiday changed... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-18 463
109474 What do you want to improve/change in your personality? À¯*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-18 468
109473 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-06-18 1
109472 Homework ÀÓ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-18 390
109471 6/16 homework ³ª*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-06-18 498
109470 Task ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-18 434
109469 What is a mistake that you would want to repeat? ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-18 467
109468 HW ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-06-18 425
109467 What would you like to know about your country? ÇÏ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-18 424
109466 Are you currently raising a pet? If not, have you ever thought... ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 418
109465 homework ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 3
109464 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 401
109463 HOMEWORK ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 415
109462 The most livable in my country ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 1
109461 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 396
109460 Homework Ç¥*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 4
109459 I want to be a cat! Among the small ones. ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 388
109458 What Korean policy/law do you think should be removed? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-17 443

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04