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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

My favorite sweets treats are Twix, and ABC chocolate.

작성자: 김*랑
2021-07-06 655

회원님의 영작문







Twix, and ABC chocolate is my favorite sweets. My friends likes Jelly more then chocolate. They loves chewy feeling, but I like soft feeling, so I like chocolate more then Jelly. Chocolate also have strengths and weaknesses like jelly. Chocolate's Strengths is first, they help our concentration better then before in study time. Chocolate's weaknesses is first, they harm our health.
Twix is from Germany(Maybe...), this chocolates are very famous, and also popular in people, because this Twix is made with snacks and, chocolate. ABC chocolate is just small chocolate, but this is also famous, and also popular, because there are many chocolate made by just chocolate, but this ABC chocolate is most delicious then others. Not just me, everybody is agree and empathize like me.

P.S. Actually I like Hershey's too^^;;

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi Maria!

We both love chocolates! I love Reese's and Swiss and Belgian chocolates in very pretty boxes. Who doesn't love chocolates. I think that if we eat too much of them, we can get cavities, be sick, and fat. So let's just enjoy every piece every now and then.

I'm glad to know about your favorite chocolates! See you in class again soon. 

-T. Donna =)

Twix, and ABC chocolate is my favorite sweets. 
>> Twix, and ABC chocolate are my favorite sweets. 

My friends likes Jelly more then chocolate. 
>> My friends like Jelly more than chocolates. 

They loves chewy feeling, but I like soft feeling, so I like chocolate more then Jelly. 
>> They love the chewy feeling but I like the soft feeling, so I like chocolate more than Jelly. 

Chocolate also have strengths and weaknesses like jelly. 
>> Correct!

Chocolate's Strengths is first, they help our concentration better then before in study time. 
>> Chocolate's strengths first is they help our concentration better than before in studying time. 

Chocolate's weaknesses is first, they harm our health.
>> Chocolate's weakness is it harms our health.

Twix is from Germany(Maybe...), this chocolates are very famous, and also popular in people, because this Twix is made with snacks and, chocolate. 
>> Twix is from America and this chocolate are very famous and also popular in people because it is made with snacks and chocolate. 

ABC chocolate is just small chocolate, but this is also famous, and also popular, because there are many chocolate made by just chocolate, but this ABC chocolate is most delicious then others. 
>> ABC chocolate is just a small chocolate, but this is also famous and also popular because there are many chocolates made.  ABC chocolate is thje most delicious than others. 

Not just me, everybody is agree and empathize like me.
>> Not just me, everybody agrees and empathizes with me.

P.S. Actually I like Hershey's too^^;;
>> Correct!
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전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
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04

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