¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What country do you want to visit and why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*¿µ
2021-07-06 235

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I want to visit England because I love England movie and drama such as Harry Potter and Sherlock Holmes. If I visit the country, I want to go to movie and drama set. The most reason why I want to go England is that I hope to go to college major in accounting and finance. England is famous for accounting and finance. Therefore, I'm going to be an international accountant working in UK.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Yeong! ^^

That's actually a good choice. Europe is known for many great sceneries. The reasons for traveling to Europe are endless. As if its history, culture and natural beauty are not enough to draw you; the cuisine, the locals and the myriad of sights and wonders to see would be more than enough to suffice many visitors. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

I want to visit England because I love England movie and drama such as Harry Potter and Sherlock Holmes. 
>> I want to visit England because I love the movies and dramas from that country such Harry Potter and Sherlock Holmes.

If I visit the country, I want to go to movie and drama set. 
>> If I visit the country, I want to go to a movie and drama set. 

The most reason why I want to go England is that I hope to go to college major in accounting and finance. 
>> The main reason why I want to go there is because I hope to study accountancy and financing in their colleges. 

England is famous for accounting and finance. 
>> CORRECT

Therefore, I'm going to be an international accountant working in UK.
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
109710 Homework °­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-29 336
109709 How do you improve your interpersonal skill? Explain. ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-29 1
109708 Which one do you think is better, buying things in the mall or... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-29 0
109707 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-06-29 220
109706 What\'s the most delicious fruit in your opinion? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-29 1
109705 Homework ½É*»ó ¿Ï·á 2021-06-29 206
109704 Homework ½É*»ó ¿Ï·á 2021-06-29 289
109703 How do you think can the rich countries help the poor countries? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-29 248
109702 Tuesday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-06-29 250
109701 Do you have a sleeping disorder? ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-29 250
109700 homework ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-06-29 215
109699 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-29 2
109698 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-29 2
109697 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-29 1
109696 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-29 1
109695 What weird things in one¡¯s bucket list have you heard of? ÃÖ*¿Á ¿Ï·á 2021-06-29 0
109694 If you could change one thing about your culture, what would it... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-29 1
109693 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-29 1
109692 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-06-29 2
109691 This year\'s rainy season to begin in July: weather agency À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-29 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04