¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*¿µ
2021-07-08 585

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

1. most of cheer dancer has nice figure.
2. gorgeous dress is worn on the wedding day.
3. I'm metabolism is fast. so I don't worry that eat at midnight.
4. My clothes wet because of outside It is raining. I have to change outfit.
5. I like snacks. especially I like shrimp snacks.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Kylie!
Thank you for the response. You were able to express your ideas however, it's important to also observe the capitalizations and punctuation marks in your sentences. I've given some necessary corrections to this entry. I hope they can be helpful. You did well. ^^
~Elica~
1. most of cheer dancer has nice figure.
>>Most of the cheer dancers have nice figures. 
2. gorgeous dress is worn on the wedding day.
>>A gorgeous dress is worn on the wedding day. 
3. I'm metabolism is fast. so I don't worry that eat at midnight.
>>My metabolism is fast, so I don't worry about eating at midnight. 
4. My clothes wet because of outside It is raining. 
>>My clothes got wet because it's raining outside. 
I have to change outfit.
>>I have to change my outfit.
5. I like snacks. especially I like shrimp snacks.
>>I like snacks, especially shrimp snacks. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
111936 ¼÷Á¦ ±è*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-13 847
111935 What is most important appointment nowadays? ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-13 811
111934 What good advice can you give your friend about her situation? ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-13 1
111933 What kind of food reminds you of your childhood and why? ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-13 577
111932 What is your expected salary? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-09-13 589
111931 9.13 homework ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-13 1
111930 What other companies are you interviewing with? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-09-13 457
111929 How do you handle unexpected events? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-09-13 455
111928 i\'m tired.................. ¿À*°á ¿Ï·á 2021-09-13 470
111927 What skills do you think are most critical to this job? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-09-13 407
111926 What is your unforgettable Chuseok? Answer in a few sentences. ±è*¹¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-13 578
111925 Good show for kids ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-09-13 430
111924 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-13 499
111923 If you can add a room to your house, what room would it be and... ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-09-13 537
111922 Homework ±è*È¿ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-13 391
111921 What kind of food reminds you of your childhood and why? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-09-13 1
111920 Homework ±è*È¿ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-13 478
111919 Homework ±è*È¿ ¿Ï·á 2021-09-13 396
111918 About austraillia À±*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-09-13 1
111917 If you can add a room to your house, what room would it be and... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-09-13 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04