¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Friday homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*¿ì
2021-07-09 349

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Q:What are some reasons that people become homeless?
A:I think it's because they have not enough money for live.
First, if they become homeless, then some people give them some foods or money.
Second, if they become homeless, then they don't have to buy their house and foods themselves.
Lastly, I think they will buy something they need with their money someday, because they can't live homeless all times.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Paul!

Thank you for doing your homework. :)

I understand that English could be really difficult.

But it only takes faith and confidence in yourself to perfect it.

You are a smart person and I know that with constant practice you will do great¡¦ ^_^

Xoxo,

T. Christina ^^

Here are my corrections for you:


I think it's because they have not enough money for live.

>> I think it's because they don't have enough money to live in a house.
First, if they become homeless, then some people give them some foods or money.

>> If they become homeless, some people will give them some food or money.
Second, if they become homeless, then they don't have to buy their house and foods themselves.

>> If that is the case, then they become lazy to buy a house or food for themselves.
Lastly, I think they will buy something they need with their money someday, because they can't live homeless all times.

>> I think they will buy things that they need with their money someday, because they can't be homeless forever.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
111272 Homework 4 »ç* ¿Ï·á 2021-08-26 0
111271 8/26 homework ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-26 463
111270 The Bank Of Korea Set Standard Interest Rate, Act Covid-19 As... È«*Çý ¿Ï·á 2021-08-26 3
111269 Do you bring much luggage when you travel? Have you ever paid... ±è*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-26 266
111268 e-mail correction ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-26 3
111267 My family ±è*À» ¿Ï·á 2021-08-26 2
111266 8.25 homework ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 2
111265 Kate! ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 1
111264 Use manageable, motivated, and pound in a correct sentence. ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 283
111263 page 5 ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 282
111262 HOMEWORK: Why is honesty important? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 387
111261 Describe how you get when you¡¯re moody in a few sentences. ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 2
111260 Do you always believe the media? ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 2
111259 8/25: My Money~~~~ ¿À*°á ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 245
111258 Famous place of Seoul ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 290
111257 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 314
111256 If you had 3 wishes, what would it be and why? ÇÏ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 269
111255 4th ±è*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 1
111254 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 6
111253 61 ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-25 370

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04