¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think that talent is needed to be successful in life? Why or why not?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-07-09 245

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

If there are a lot of talents to me, it will be very great for living my life.
But, the most important thing is not a talent, it is effort.
For instance, there is a genius, but he or she didn't make any effort for his or her purpose of life.
Then he or she is a genius so he or she has a lot of talents, but he or she won't show his or her abilities to the other people.
But if someone hasn't any talents but he or she made efforts, he or she will succeed his or her purpose of life.
So I think the efforts are more important than the talents.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Clara! ^^

That is true! Talents are very important. Everyone has one but we need to use it wisely to become successful. :) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

If there are a lot of talents to me, it will be very great for living my life.
>> If I have a lot of talents, I would be living a great life. 

But, the most important thing is not a talent, it is effort.
>> But the most important thing is not talent, it is effort.

For instance, there is a genius, but he or she didn't make any effort for his or her purpose of life.
>> For instance, there is a genius, but he or she didn't make any effort for his or her purpose in life.

Then he or she is a genius so he or she has a lot of talents, but he or she won't show his or her abilities to the other people.
>> That person might be a genius or have a talent, but he/she didn't use his/her ability to become successful. 

But if someone hasn't any talents but he or she made efforts, he or she will succeed his or her purpose of life.
>> If we use talents wisely, then we can succeed in life. 

So I think the efforts are more important than the talents.
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
109647 Email ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-25 250
109646 Email ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-25 223
109645 Homework °­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-25 219
109644 My favorite mystery story is . ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-06-25 231
109643 Did you enjoy festivals better when you were still younger or do... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-25 0
109642 Hello buddy ½É*½Ä ¿Ï·á 2021-06-25 239
109641 What is a very important thing to remember when driving a car?... ÃÖ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-06-25 251
109640 What are some things about the eating habits you want to change? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-25 240
109639 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-25 260
109638 What food can you recommend for me to eat in Korea? ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-06-25 331
109637 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-25 1
109636 Homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-06-25 1
109635 What is the best place for a vacation in your country? Why is it... ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-06-25 272
109634 Homework ÀÓ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-25 231
109633 homework : essay À±*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-06-25 1
109632 Task ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-25 226
109631 Do you need a bucket list? ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-25 198
109630 What do you need to prepare for? ÇÏ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-06-25 224
109629 If you retire in the future, what do you think would your life... ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2021-06-25 206
109628 Did you ever want to be a model? ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-06-24 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04