¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

If you are to start a business, what would that be and why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¿À*Àº
2021-07-10 572

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

If i had a business, I want to stock.
I want to make a lot of money with stocks.^^

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Emma ! ^^

The best option is always to make or sell a product or service that you know about and love. If you¡¯re looking for someplace to score a short-term hit just for the sake of reaping a financial gain, that¡¯s fine – get in; make your money; and get out. But if you¡¯re looking to start a business for the long haul that suits your temperament, your strengths and the lifestyle you want, you must choose a business that you love.

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

If i had a business, I want to stock.
>> If I had a business, I want it to be about the stock market. 

I want to make a lot of money with stocks.
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
109772 HW ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2021-07-02 0
109771 What are the changes happening in you country now? ÇÏ*Á¶ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-02 385
109770 What is a perfect relationship? ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-02 3
109769 Some people think women should be given equal chances to work... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-01 315
109768 What will you do if your boss is requesting information that you... À¯*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-07-01 278
109767 My son ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-01 4
109766 homework ³ª*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-07-01 466
109765 How do you think is public transportation going to change in the... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-07-01 1
109764 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-01 1
109763 HOMEWORK ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-01 353
109762 Homework °­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-01 337
109761 Email ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-01 378
109760 Email ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-01 574
109759 Email ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-01 417
109758 Which one do you think is better, buying things in the mall or... ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-01 328
109757 ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-07-01 336
109756 Fill in the blanks ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-07-01 406
109755 Do you advise people in Korea to take the Covid vaccine? ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-01 1
109754 How do you think is public transportation going to change in the... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-07-01 410
109753 Homework ½É*»ó ¿Ï·á 2021-07-01 594

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04