¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

If you are to start a business, what would that be and why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¿À*Àº
2021-07-10 566

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

If i had a business, I want to stock.
I want to make a lot of money with stocks.^^

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Emma ! ^^

The best option is always to make or sell a product or service that you know about and love. If you¡¯re looking for someplace to score a short-term hit just for the sake of reaping a financial gain, that¡¯s fine – get in; make your money; and get out. But if you¡¯re looking to start a business for the long haul that suits your temperament, your strengths and the lifestyle you want, you must choose a business that you love.

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

If i had a business, I want to stock.
>> If I had a business, I want it to be about the stock market. 

I want to make a lot of money with stocks.
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
108462 My homework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-05-13 865
108461 How much does the weekend mean to you? ÀÌ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-13 615
108460 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-13 1
108459 Do you drink enough water every day? How precious is water in... È«*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-05-13 1
108458 Homework. ÀÓ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-13 567
108457 : It is impossible to help all people around the world in need... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-13 692
108456 How to get advice! Á¤*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-13 594
108455 Homework º¯*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-13 5
108454 What can you do or tell someone depressed to make him/her feel... ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-05-12 2
108453 Interview Q ±Ç*½Ã ¿Ï·á 2021-05-12 2
108452 Homework (282) ¹Ú*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-12 605
108451 The best news! ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-12 879
108450 Books ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-12 1
108449 Homework ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-05-12 636
108448 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-05-12 627
108447 grammar ¼Õ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2021-05-12 517
108446 On the way to work ÁÖ*³ª ¿Ï·á 2021-05-12 536
108445 Homework °­*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2021-05-12 1205
108444 I want to try the sashimi, because of future(?) ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-05-12 1033
108443 Like program ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-05-12 599

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04