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영작교정 게시판

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서비스 입니다.

People nowadays tend to have children at older ages. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvan

작성자: 황*하
2021-07-13 358

회원님의 영작문

Many people think that if they have babies, they can't enjoy their life. They need to put too much efforts until their children become adults. Young generations don't want to get married these days because they would like to enjoy their life by doing what they like. They also encounter difficulties to get a job therefore it is required to show their abilities with as many as certificate such as the record of foreign language test and licenses in various industries. They feel exhausted to study a lot of things and prepare job interview. People can't afford to have children and partners. I had same thought as young people when I was single. I would like to get a jog first and then saved money for my house because it is kind of men's obligation to prepare house and women needed to prepare all house appliances. It is quite burden for men to rent or purchase a house because the price of it is expensive that young people can afford. But I sometime regret that I had babies too late because

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

FANTASTIC TUESDAY MR. HWANG~! ^^
“Happy Tuesday! We are responsible for peace and order in our lives! When your world is CONSTANTLY filled with chaos, then it’s time to take a look at SELF!” - Tracey Edmonds
TAKE A DEEP BREATH! Life is absolutely what you make it. Let yourself change. Allow yourself to be new. Good luck! ^^
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
Many people think that if they have babies, they can't enjoy their life. 
>>> CORRECT
They need to put too much effort until their children become adults. 
>>> CORRECT
Young generations don't want to get married these days because they would like to enjoy their life by doing what they want. 
>>> CORRECT
They also encounter difficulties to get a job therefore it is required to show their abilities with as many as certificates such as the record of foreign language test and licenses in various industries. 
>>> CORRECT
They feel exhausted to study a lot of things and prepare job interview.
>>> They feel exhausted studying a lot of things and prepare for job interviews.
 People can't afford to have children and partners.
>>> CORRECT
 I had the same thoughts as young people when I was single. 
>>> CORRECT
I would like to get a jog first and then saved money for my house because it is kind of men's obligation to prepare house and women needed to prepare all house appliances. 
>>> I would like to get a job first and then save money for my house because it is kind of men's obligation to prepare for the house and women need to prepare all house appliances. 
It is quite burden for men to rent or purchase a house because the price of it is expensive that young people can afford.
>>> It is such a burden for men to rent or purchase a house because the price of it is expensive that young people can't afford.
 But I sometimes regret why I had babies too late because... 
>>> CORRECT
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첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
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04

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