¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

If you are going to make a song, what would it be about and who are you dedicating it to? Explain yo

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2021-07-13 402

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

If I am going to make a song, I think it will be about my life and I want to put my experience and about its feeling to the lyrics.
Because I am interesting about hip hop music and usually almost artist put their experiences to their lyrics of music.
And also some hip hop artists put their minds about their experiences to their lyrics, and my favorite hip hop artist does that.
So if I am going to make a song, I think it will be about my life and I want to put my experience and about its feeling to the lyrics.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John! ^^

That's a great answer! This can really uplift your and other people's spirits. :) 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

If I am going to make a song, I think it will be about my life and I want to put my experience and about its feeling to the lyrics.
>>If I am going to make a song, I think it will be about my life and I want to put my experience. 

Because I am interesting about hip hop music and usually almost artist put their experiences to their lyrics of music.
>>  I am interested in hip hop music and usually almost artist put their experiences to their lyrics. 

And also some hip hop artists put their minds about their experiences to their lyrics, and my favorite hip hop artist does that.
>>Also, some hip hop artists put thoughts to their lyrics. My favorite hip hop artist does that.

So if I am going to make a song, I think it will be about my life and I want to put my experience and about its feeling to the lyrics.
>>So if I am going to make a song, I think it will be about my life and I want to put my experience in it as well. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
111370 IELTS writing task1 line graph ½Å*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 1
111369 How do you greet someone you just met? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2021-08-30 359
111368 page 13 ¿À*Àº ¿Ï·á 2021-08-29 399
111367 Homework 8.30 Àå*º° ¿Ï·á 2021-08-29 609
111366 What is the most exciting thing you have ever done? ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-29 329
111365 wage ceiling? ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-29 460
111364 9 ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-29 402
111363 65 ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-29 305
111362 Homework ³²*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-08-29 413
111361 HOMEWORK: Is it possible to avoid conflicts totally in our life?... ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-29 377
111360 Do you prefer Korean cars or foreign cars? Share your thoughts... ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-28 434
111359 I think expression, and grammar will be better! ±è*¶û ¿Ï·á 2021-08-28 362
111358 DIRECTIONS: Please use the expressions in a sentence: ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-28 1
111357 colonization À±*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-28 3
111356 Please correct it À±*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-28 2
111355 What are some of the advantages and disadvantages of driving... Ȳ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-28 3
111354 If you can eat one food for the rest of your life, what would it... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-28 0
111353 Homework ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-28 455
111352 8.27 homework ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 1
111351 Did you ever cancel an appointment? Why? Share your answer in a... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-27 377

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04