¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿¬
2021-07-14 652

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I like my birthstone.
My birthday is February 23rd.
So my birthstone is amethyst.
Amethyst is purple and very shiny, so it's very pretty.
I think the reason I like amethyst the most is because it's my birthstone.
But other birthstones seem to be very beautiful.
I think all the jewels seem pretty and beautiful.
And I'd like to have a ring with my birthstone..haha

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Jenny,

  Thank you for taking time to answer this question. It only proves that you really wanted to improve in your English skill. Please do check and take note of the corrections for your improvement. I hope it helped you. 

Keep up the good work!

Sincerely,
Teacher Annie (^^)



I like my birthstone.
>>> CORRECT

My birthday is February 23rd.
>>> CORRECT
OR: My birthday is on February 23. 

So my birthstone is amethyst.
>>> CORRECT
OR: My birthstone is amethyst.

Amethyst is purple and very shiny, so it's very pretty.
>>> Amethyst is purple and it's very shiny, so it's very pretty.

I think the reason I like amethyst the most is because it's my birthstone.
>>> I think the reason why I like amethyst the most is that it's my birthstone.

But other birthstones seem to be very beautiful.
>>> CORRECT
OR: But other birthstones seem to be very beautiful too.

I think all the jewels seem pretty and beautiful.
>>> I think all of the jewels/gems are pretty and beautiful.

And I'd like to have a ring with my birthstone..haha
>>> I'd like to have a ring with my birthstone on it.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
114829 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 0
114828 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 0
114827 Is it easy for you to make friends? Why or why not? ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 1
114826 Does education guarantee a good job? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 733
114825 For many Korean high school seniors, winter is the season for... À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 1
114824 Do you keep plants inside your house? Why or why not? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 531
114823 Samsung\'s bespoken water purifier becomes first to remove... À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 0
114822 Mythology Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 398
114821 If you could change one thing about your current house to make... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 559
114820 If you could change one thing about your current house to make... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 0
114819 How would you close a conversation if you were \"seeing someone... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 402
114818 Grapes gain in popularity thanks to new variety À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 0
114817 What will be your New Year\'s Resolution this coming new year? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 0
114816 Chocolate for Sadness and Emptiness ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 407
114815 Travel will be back in 2022 but in a different form, says... À¯*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 0
114814 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 333
114813 Friday homeowrk ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 316
114812 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 1
114811 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 0
114810 Homework °­*¼± ¿Ï·á 2021-12-17 419

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04