¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

HOMEWORK/YUN/2021/0714

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¤*À±
2021-07-15 476

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In my opinion, the idea of people using same global language it self is positive but, also has a negative aspect in the way of loosing diversity of culture.
Reason for positive expectation is that people can communicate with foreigners more easily. When we try to communicate with foreigners, we have to study new languages. It¡¯s very hard to learn another languages and it¡¯s also impossible to speak like natives.Also, to learn foreign languages, you have to put an effort a lot and also cost money a lot to enroll a institute.
In the aspect of negative expectation, the reason why is that using same language around the world can cause the extinct of culture diversity. There are some socialist claiming that language represent the identity of particular culture so it¡¯s important to preserve each languages.
From this point of view, using one global language all over the world can make the culture standardize.
Hence, both opinions are acceptable, but all have positive and negative aspects.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Yun! It's great to see you here on the composition site!

First of all, congratulations to the submission of this IELTS essay answer. Your strong points are breaking down the pros and cons of  speaking a common language. Moreover, your arguments have supporting details. For the conclusion, you have to make it solid by wrapping up the points you have made on your discussion.

Let us discuss how you can make a substantial conclusion in class tomorrow. Excellent job for this first written IELTS answer!

See you then!

-T. Donna =)

In my opinion, the idea of people using same global language it self is positive but, also has a negative aspect in the way of loosing diversity of culture.
>> In my opinion, the idea of people using the same global language is positive but also has a negative aspect by loosing diversity of culture.

Reason for positive expectation is that people can communicate with foreigners more easily. 
>> The reason for positive expectation is that people can communicate with foreigners more easily. 

When we try to communicate with foreigners, we have to study new languages. 
>> Correct!

It¡¯s very hard to learn another languages and it¡¯s also impossible to speak like natives.
>> It¡¯s very hard to learn another language and it¡¯s also impossible to speak like natives.

Also, to learn foreign languages, you have to put an effort a lot and also cost money a lot to enroll a institute.
>> Also, to learn foreign languages, you have to put a lot of effort and it also costs a lot of money to enroll in an institute.

In the aspect of negative expectation, the reason why is that using same language around the world can cause the extinct of culture diversity. 
>> In the aspect of negative expectation, using the same language around the world can cause the extinction of cultural diversity. 

There are some socialist claiming that language represent the identity of particular culture so it¡¯s important to preserve each languages.
>> There are some socialists claiming that a language represents the identity of particular culture so it¡¯s important to preserve each language.

From this point of view, using one global language all over the world can make the culture standardize.
>> ...standardized.

Hence, both opinions are acceptable, but all have positive and negative aspects.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
110783 Homework {08/11} Â÷*ºó ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 245
110782 What advice would you give a foreigner visiting your country who... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 1
110781 What is the most useful thing that you own and why? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 0
110780 What advice would you give a foreigner visiting your country who... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 384
110779 What kind of device should be invented in order for our lives to... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 0
110778 Wednesday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 422
110777 page 25 ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 377
110776 What other language are you interested to speak? ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 939
110775 English writing interview expected question\'s answer ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 635
110774 HOMEWORK: Choose the right word. Àü*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 381
110773 Many people put their personal information online (address,... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 408
110772 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 255
110771 Will science find a solution to the environmental problems we... ³ë*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 2
110770 Homework😀 ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 276
110769 Homework ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 213
110768 Homework😀 ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 362
110767 Homework🌱 ¹Ú*¸® ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 356
110766 ¼÷Á¦ ±è*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 336
110765 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 2
110764 homework ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2021-08-11 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04